A Friend In Need
by Lady Sidera
Summary: When John has an unfortunate experience offworld, Rodney blames himself. How could he ever have hoped to have friends when all he does is hurt everyone and everything he comes into contact with? Part 3 up COMPLETE!
1. Part I: M3R571

**A Friend In Need**

Summary: When John has an unfortunate experience offworld, Rodney blames himself. How could he ever have hoped to have friends when all he does is hurt everyone and everything he comes into contact with?  
Central Characters: Rodney and John. (Friendship fic.)  
Categories: Angst, Drama, H/C, Smarm.  
Placement: Following "Childhood's End", before "Poisoning the Well". Sort of an epilogue to the former.  
Rating: PG for some blood, violence, and minor language.  
Spoilers: Lots for "Childhood's End", "38 Minutes", "Rising Part II", very vague incidental references to "Hide And Seek", "Home", "The Eye", "Hot Zone", "Letters From Pegasus", "The Gift", and _SG-1's_ "48 Hours", and "Redemption Parts I, II".  
Author's Note: This fic is for Heidi and Marla, who wanted (respectively) Rodney and Shep whumping. I put both the boys through the wringer physically and psychologically as best I could... ;) Hope you enjoy it. :) Oh, and I apologise to everyone reading this for the unrealistic medical stuff; consider it dramatic license and try to ignore it if you can't forgive it. Originally posted on AtlantisGenGate.  
Disclaimer: Legally speaking, Rodney is not mine; nor is John. They belong to MGM, SciFi, et al. But this story and everything I do to Rodney and John in it _is_ mine... So please don't use it without asking. :)

Author's Note, contd: This is a completed fic in 3 parts. The next two will be going up within a week or so; possibly sooner, depending on what kind of a response I get. I mean, if I get reviews shamelessly begging for more... :p Yeah, dream on. ;)

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**Part 1: M3R-571**

John Sheppard surveyed the bizarre landscape around him with eyebrows raised disapprovingly. From horizon to horizon, there was nothing to be seen but disturbingly twisted rock formations. All were weirdly mottled in any of a number of shades of brown, and varied in size from two to two hundred feet high. All right if you liked that kind of thing, Sheppard decided, but not quite his piece of cake.

The strangest thing, he reflected, was the way the edges of one distorted monolith seemed to blend into another; the more you stared at them, the more confused the whole mess got. Between the color scheme and the design, it was very hard to judge any kind of distance. And he was sure it would be no fun at all to get lost on this planet.

John decided to give his eyes a rest from it.

He glanced to the side as a noise told him McKay had stepped up next to him.

"Kind of reminds you of, uh, Siberia, doesn't it?" Rodney asked.

John considered this, taking another look at the landscape. "Not really," he decided.

Rodney turned on him with his superiour face. "Have you ever _been_ to Siberia?"

"Yeah." Sheppard paused. "Twice."

Rodney looked deflated. "Oh."

Aiden Ford joined in the conversation. "So what's it look like, sir? Siberia?"

"It's not really as... Brown," he informed his lieutenant.

"No, I see what you mean," said Rodney, determined not to be left out. "It's more a sort of grey in Siberia."

"Well," Sheppard couldn't resist saying, "it was white when I was there."

Rodney rolled his eyes. "Whatever! I suppose it must have snowed. Who cares? All I meant was that it's very big, very bleak, and there doesn't seem to be anyone around."

"Well that could be anywhere. Why Siberia?"

Rodney turned quietly caustic. "All right," he said. "I was mistaken. What I should have said was, 'It reminds you of Mars, doesn't it?'"

"Have you ever _been_ to Mars?" shot back the Major.

"No," McKay returned immediately, looking smug, "but neither have you."

As Rodney wandered away, Teyla addressed Sheppard. "I do not think there will be natives on this world," she said. "It seems very... barren."

"Yeah, I think you're right about that," he agreed. "We'll just wait for McKay to finish up with his scientific stuff, and then we'll get back to Atlantis."

Teyla nodded, and Ford said, "Right, sir."

Rodney came back a moment later looking very pleased about something. "Well," he told John, "my, um, 'scientific stuff' didn't turn up any signs of an energy source," he paused to smirk, then continued on a different, and slightly more sincere tack, "But these rock formations are absolutely amazing."

"Better than Siberia?"

Rodney ignored him. "I mean, I don't know much about this kind of thing, but some of the geologists are going to go nuts when they see this."

John blinked, feigning confusion. "Did you just say that you didn't know much about something?"

Rodney looked at him, halfway between honesty and grumpiness. "Frankly, I never saw the appeal."

"Oh!"

"What does that mean?"

"Oh? Well, it just means... Oh." He grinned at Rodney, who shook his head and made "What?" faces.

"Right," Sheppard said. Having successfully confused McKay, he turned back to the Stargate. "Let's head out."

"What?" Rodney spoke up. "Aren't we even going to look around at all?"

John raised an eyebrow. Apparently Rodney's eavesdropping talents were confined to comments specifically about himself. "What for?"

"What for?" Rodney repeated, clearly baffled as to what to make of this answer. "What for? Don't you have any sense of curiosity whatsoever?"

John thought about it. There wasn't any actual hurry to get back to Base. If McKay wanted to look around for a few minutes, he supposed that was okay. As long as they didn't get lost, there was no reason to assume that the planet was hostile enough to cause any serious trouble in half an hour.

Besides, he wanted to have a look around himself.

Sheppard swung back to face the antagonistic scientist again. "Sure," he told him. "I'm curious. Let's go."

Rodney was taken by surprise. "Oh, all right. Good."

"Ford, Teyla," Sheppard told the other two team members, "stay by the Gate. If we're not back in half an hour, try the radio. If you can't raise us, call Weir and tell her what's up. I'm gonna go take McKay on a little field trip."

"Field trip...?" muttered Rodney in the background.

"Yes, sir," Ford said.

John gave Teyla a wave, and went to join Rodney, who was looking distinctly annoyed.

"'Field trip?'" McKay asked, as they started to tramp off. "I could have gone by myself, you know. I don't need a babysitter to watch me every time I go a few feet away."

"That's a matter of opinion," grinned Sheppard.

Rodney felt the beginnings of a smile threatening to ruin his composure. Oh, he had so walked into that one. But he pretended not to have heard, and studied the device he was holding more closely.

John bent his head to stare at the familiar-looking object Rodney was so absorbed in. "What is that thing?"

Rodney kept looking at it, but with a smug expression on his face now. "Oh, it's just something I picked up in Atlantis."

"An Ancient thing? Let me see..." John tried to grab it, but Rodney pulled it out of reach.

"You can look at it later!" he said peevishly. "I'm actually using it at the moment, if you hadn't noticed."

John cocked his head as Rodney bent over the device again. He finally placed the technology. "Is that one of those... people-finder things from the Jumpers?"

"The life signs detectors?" Rodney, intent on the readings, missed John's expression at his terminology. "Yes, yes, it is," he confirmed, sounding quite impatient for no good reason.

"Why have you got one of those?" John asked curiously. "Expecting company?"

"It's not just for locating life signs, Major. It's much more complex than that."

"So what's it do then?"

"It does a lot of things, actually," McKay explained proudly. "Mostly, it's useful scientifically for detecting radiation, EM fields, energy signatures..."

"Oh." John nodded sagely.

"Not too surprising, really. I mean, it's a similar concept."

"Right. What else does it do?"

"Well..." Rodney gestured vaguely, then owned up. "We're not really sure yet."

"So, you finding any of that stuff?" Rodney appeared to be about to ask for clarification, so John headed him off. "Radiation or anything?"

Rodney looked up. "No," he said.

"Well," John told him, switching to mock-serious condescension, "you can keep it up a little longer, McKay, but then the field trip's over."

Rodney failed to react; then he noticed something. "The Stargate's out of sight."

"I know."

Rodney got annoyed. "Oh, I'm sure you do. I was just wondering if that might possibly be a problem?"

John shrugged provokingly. "Not for _me._"

Sheppard then headed off to look at a rock which, he thought, kind of resembled a cow. If you looked at it the right way, that is.

Rodney glanced over at Sheppard, who was standing off by himself tilting his head back and forth at a big, lumpy rock.

Why did he bother? Seriously, Rodney asked himself, why did he even keep trying? No one ever wanted to talk to him for any length of time, and personally, he couldn't really blame them. Even if he was a genius, and the smartest person in Atlantis, he was still, to be quite frank, not much fun. He just wished that if they were going to talk to him, they wouldn't just make fun of him all the time.

It was his own fault; it must be. And it was very unscientific to assume, that after all these years, someone might actually want to hang around with him. None of the factors had changed: He was the same, and the world was the same. He just ought to get used to the idea that no one would ever like him.

And he had to stop letting people get to him. He'd told himself this over and over, as far back as he could remember. But still, some people always did.

And the people he admired did it the worst.

So Rodney responded in the way he always did when his feelings were hurt: he got surly.

John turned around again from the cow-rock (which he'd discovered really looked more like a goose from some angles) to see McKay angrily stuffing his Ancient device into his vest, and scowling at the ground.

John raised his eyebrows as he sauntered over. "Done already?"

Rodney avoided his eyes. "Yes, I am. There's nothing here, so let's just go."

"All right," conceded the Major. "You're the one who wanted to go for a walk."

"Oh, right," Rodney replied, overreacting, "and I dragged you all the way out here for absolutely nothing! I'm so sorry to have put you to the trouble!"

Sheppard eyed the scientist's hunched back in surprise.

"You feeling all right, McKay?"

Rodney's reply was deeply sarcastic. "Yes, perfectly wonderful, and you, Major?"

Sheppard didn't answer. McKay, he realised, had been out of sorts all day long. You could never tell what his next mood-swing would be when he was like this. It was best, he'd found, to just talk as little as possible.

"Are we going or aren't we?" Rodney half-turned to ask impatiently.

"Sure," Sheppard said affably. "Let's go."

Rodney waited for him to get ahead, and then followed a couple of paces behind.

He felt guilty. He shouldn't have lost his temper like that. It was just one of those days when things didn't go right at all... If he had found a ZedPM here, it would have been like back on that kiddie planet - M7G-677, where everything had turned bad. No matter what he did, it always seemed to come out wrong. He hated that.

Still thinking, Rodney looked up, and stopped. Sheppard stopped, too, turning to see what the matter was. "This isn't the way to the Stargate," Rodney asserted.

"Yes it is," John told him. "It's just a little different."

"Meaning...?"

"It's a short-cut."

Rodney rolled his eyes, and started after the Major again. "Oh, of course it is. I just hope you don't get us both hopelessly lost."

John smiled to himself. Getting lost with McKay. Yeah, that would really be a picnic.

Sheppard thought for a second that he glimpsed a movement at the edge of his vision, a little ways up ahead. But when he looked again, there was nothing there, just the endless patterned brown rock.

He stepped towards it to investigate, ignoring McKay's irritated question behind him. No, there was nothing there. Or... He went closer. There was something there. Some kind of animal about the size of a cat that blended in with the rock, lying right across the path he and Rodney were on. It was almost impossible to see, except when it moved - or if you got, really, really close.

_Too close,_ Sheppard's instincts told him. One thing he'd learned very quickly, was that you stay away from aliens, be they birds, bugs, or whatever.

He started to back off slowly.

"Some sort of animal," he informed McKay over his shoulder. "I think we should go-"

As Rodney watched, a piece of the rock seemed to suddenly detach itself from the ground and fly at John, who threw up one arm to shield his face. The creature latched on for a couple of seconds before Sheppard was able to fling it to the ground. While Rodney continued to stare, paralysed with shock, John whipped up his gun, and fired almost point blank at the animal. He gave it a few extra bursts to make sure it was dead. Then he just stood there.

"Major?"

Rodney hoped this wasn't as bad as he thought it was. The Major was still on his feet... But now he was swaying a little unsteadily. Rodney finally managed to move, and went at a run to where Sheppard still stood, about a dozen feet away.

"Major, are you all right?"

"Yeah..." Sheppard answered, though he didn't seem sure. "Yeah, just a little... a _little_ dizzy."

Rodney instinctively caught him as he collapsed, and lowered him into a sitting position.

John was confused. Why did he feel so bad? It took intense concentration to come up with the answer. He remembered the sharp pain in his arm... "Poison."

"What?" Rodney sounded scared.

"That thing... bit me." It wasn't easy to talk. Hell, it wasn't easy to _breathe._ This wasn't good...

He felt Rodney start to move away, and grabbed the scientist's sleeve.

"_Don't touch it!"_ he ordered. Snakes, jellyfish - all kinds of poisonous things could still give you a fatal dose of venom after they were dead. He couldn't explain. He just hoped McKay would have the sense to do as he was told.

"Right, of course," Rodney said absently, and stayed put. John managed to glance up at the scientist. He looked even more scared than he had sounded. But his voice didn't show it any more.

Sheppard gathered himself together. It was going to have to be now, or quite literally never. He started trying to squirm out of his vest.

"What are you doing?"

John fell back. It was too hard. He just didn't have enough strength...

"Take... my jacket... off," he panted.

Thankfully, McKay didn't ask any questions now. He leaped into action, and had the vest and jacket off in a flash. It hurt, and it made the fog of unconsciousness come way too close, but there wasn't a choice. And still John had to hold on, to keep his wits about him a little bit longer.

"What now?"

"Sleeve... Cut my sleeve."

He tried to get out his knife, but Rodney beat him too it. _Good, McKay had got the point._ Halfway through that thought, John lost consciousness.

Rodney didn't notice. He was too busy using the knife to cut and rip the fabric until John's right arm was visible. Rodney winced. There were several small puncture marks in the skin of John's forearm. All of them were swelling up and turning an unpleasant dark color.

Rodney didn't know what to do. He couldn't think. Right, he had to get the Major back to Atlantis. Carson would know what to do. It would be all right. Oh, it would have to be all right...

He was alarmed to see that Sheppard already seemed to have lost consciousness. He cursed himself for sitting around, wasting time that the Major's life might depend on. But as he started to lift him off the ground, John's eyes fluttered open, and looked into Rodney's clearly for a split second.

"Tourniquet," he said. The word was rasped out very quietly. Rodney wouldn't have been able to hear it if he had been any farther away. Then John's head fell forward again.

Tourniquet? Of course! Tie something tightly around his arm to keep the poison from making it into his system. Why hadn't he thought of that?

Rodney frantically made a long bandage from the scraps of John's shirt. Hoping that he was doing this the right way, he wound it once around the major's arm, just below the elbow, and pulled it tight.

Now what?

Radio! Radio back for help, that's what he should do.

"Ford, the Major's hurt, get Beckett here right away," he said into his mic.

Ford's voice came crackling over the radio as Rodney hoisted the unconscious John off the ground. "What happened?"

"Some alien bit him, he's poisoned, now just call Atlantis, and tell them to hurry!"

"Right!"

Rodney started to haul John towards the Stargate. He had to half-drag, half-carry him, and no matter how quickly he tried to go, it seemed far too slow.

He tried not to think about how many more of those things could be lurking in front of him, and he wouldn't even know it until it was too late... No, not a good idea. Just focus on getting the Major back while there's still time.

Ford's voice came over the radio again, startling Rodney. "We're gonna come find you."

"No," Rodney practically yelled back, "don't do that! There might be more of those things anywhere, and you'll never be able to find us anyway."

Teyla came on, "You are certain you know the way to the Stargate?"

Rodney groaned inwardly. He _had_ been sure - until they'd started asking about it. This had to be the right way... It just had to be, and he couldn't waste time thinking about it.

"Dr. McKay?"

"Yes, yes, I'm sure."

"Teyla's gonna call Atlantis," Ford informed him. "Beckett should be through with a team in a few minutes."

Then there was silence. A horrible, blank silence, broken only by the sounds of his own footsteps, his own gasping breaths, and the sound of John's feet dragging against the stony ground.

The weird patterns of the rocky landscape all blended together, contributing to the nightmare feeling growing inside Rodney. He tried to look ahead, but it was all the same, and it confused him when he tried to make out the path...

He turned his eyes down to the ground. Just one step at a time, don't look any farther ahead, or you'll get lost. Don't think ahead, just do what you have to now. Thinking won't help.

Unfortunately, Rodney couldn't help thinking... And the Major felt very limp in his arms... Almost as if he...

Rodney stopped himself with a desperate effort. That wouldn't do anyone any good!

Rodney kept on, trying to go faster. If he could just get John to the Stargate, it would be all right... A pang of fear shot through Rodney, almost making him stop dead. Where _was_ the Gate? Shouldn't it be in sight by now? Surely they hadn't walked that far coming here...

Doubt almost overcame him. If he was going the wrong way, then every step in this direction was killing the Major. It might even be too late already...

"McKay?"

Rodney turned, hope rekindling in his eyes. The Major was conscious! So maybe it would be all right after all.

"Major! How do you feel?"

John moaned in response. Rodney started to walk again, even faster than before.

"What's goin' on?" Sheppard's words came out slurred, causing Rodney to frown worriedly.

"Beckett's got a team coming through the Stargate any second now. You're going to be all right, Major, just hang on." Oh, just a little bit more, and surely the Gate would be in sight!

"Hot... McKay, s' hot..."

Rodney frowned harder. Sheppard was right; McKay could feel his head lolling against his shoulder. He hadn't had time to notice, he realised with a new pang of guilt. "You're burning up," he said, more to himself than to John, and tried to put on an extra notch of speed. "Don't worry, you'll be fine once we get you back to Atlantis." He knew he sounded confident; he had to. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to convince himself.

Rodney half-pulled John and himself up over a rise... And there at last was the Stargate, only a dozen yards away!

Just then his radio crackled into life. "McKay, Beckett's on the way. Where are you?"

"We're in sight now," was all Rodney could spare the breath to say. He started to scramble down the slope, trying not to hurt John against the rocky ground, but trying not to let the terrain slow him down either.

He was halfway to the Gate now... And suddenly Aiden and Teyla were there before he'd even heard them coming. Rodney stood back as the other two started inspecting the Major's arm. He didn't look good at all, Rodney realised. His eyes were closed again, and his face was too white. And his arm... Rodney stared at it, appalled. How long had he taken to get him back? Because the Major's forearm was now covered with horrible dark blotches, and it couldn't possibly have gotten like that in a few minutes.

He'd failed. He'd gone too slowly, or something. And now it was too late.

The Major was going to die. And it was all his fault...

A voice came out of nowhere.

"You do this?"

It was Aiden. Rodney had forgotten he was even there. He was pointing to the tourniquet.

Rodney spared a glance, then turned his eyes back to the Major's unnaturally white face. "Yes, the Major said... Is it wrong?"

"It's good," Aiden told him shortly, and looked away again and said something to Teyla.

_Why?_ Rodney thought. Why did he have to ask to go look around? He'd known there wouldn't be any energy signs within walking distance of the Gate, or he could have detected them from there. It was just his stupid curiosity. He'd simply wanted to look around, for no reason, really - and now because of that, the Major was going to die.

Rodney realised now just how much he depended on, admired - _liked_ Major Sheppard. He usually tried not to think about things like that, because the feeling was never mutual. And if you let yourself go there, you lost your reserve, your shield, and then people could hurt you. And laugh at you. It didn't matter if people laughed at a mask you put on; but if they laughed at _you_ yourself, without any defenses - well, that was the worst.

Sometimes he wondered, if he opened up a little more often, would it change anything? But his whole life, from childhood onwards had taught him that that kind of experimentation was far too risky.

It was always his fault. He'd almost wiped out an entire planet of people, just because he'd taken their ZedPM for testing. That had been his idea. And it would have been his fault if... if it had gone the way it logically should have. It was only pure luck, really, that he'd gotten the shield back on in time.

And even worse, he had put all the rest of his team in danger as well. If the natives had killed them, the way they'd planned, that would have been his fault, too.

He'd wanted to do better. He guessed he'd wanted to prove to the Major and everyone else that he could behave responsibly, that he didn't just do things without thinking, and get people hurt.

And now that's exactly what he'd done all over again.

At some point, Rodney thought to wonder what Aiden and Teyla were doing. He looked over, and saw that Aiden had taken out a knife. As Rodney watched, the lieutenant used it to cut John's arm, right along the fang marks. Of course, Rodney's numb mind told him, he was going to try to suck the poison out.

Rodney felt sick at the thought.

He tried to quell the voice that came into his mind: _It's too late. Nothing can save him now..._

Oh, if this nightmare would just end...

Aiden carefully cut along the teeth marks of whatever it was that had poisoned the Major. He'd learned how to do this in a survival class back in high school, before he'd joined up. It might be too late for it to do any good, but something he'd discovered was that it never hurt to try. This couldn't do any harm, and it might help somewhat.

As Teyla held John's arm still, Aiden bent down and started trying to suck the poison out. Teyla would have made a good nurse, back on Earth, he thought. She didn't seem to be a bit squeamish, just quietly and competently did as she was told without asking pointless questions.

When he thought he'd gotten as much as he could, Teyla handed him a bandage, and Ford wrapped it around the wound. Dr. Beckett would just take it off again, of course, when he showed up... Aiden hoped that would be soon. The Major looked just awful.

"Right, the doc should be here any second now," he said, standing up and making his voice sound confident with an effort. Teyla continued to hold John's head, trying to make him as comfortable as possible until help arrived.

Ford glanced around to look at the Stargate, and caught a glimpse of Rodney's face. He hadn't had time to notice before, but now he saw that McKay looked almost as bad as Sheppard. He was just standing there, not moving, not making a sound, and staring fixedly at Sheppard. Aiden was surprised to note that the scientist was as pale as a ghost.

"Dr. McKay, you all right?"

Rodney didn't seem to hear him. His wide, guilt-haunted eyes didn't leave the Major's face.

"Dr. McKay." Aiden put his hand on the other man's shoulder. Rodney's eyes moved, looked at him from far away.

"What?"

Aiden had seen enough battles, and the aftermaths, to know what needed to be said here. "Hey, it's not your fault."

Rodney didn't answer. Ford wasn't sure the reassurance had even gotten through to him at all. McKay's gaze drifted back to John's pale, sweat-covered face. "Is he going to die?"

The childish directness of the question took Aiden aback, as did the hopeless tone it was uttered in. He swallowed worriedly. "I hope not," was all he could say.

A noise behind him caused Aiden to turn. The Stargate had activated, and seconds later, Beckett and a team of medics came through. Ford waved to them and shouted, "Over here!" The team started for them at a run.

Rodney saw Beckett and his team as if from another plane of existence. Hoping against Hope takes a lot of effort, and Rodney had almost lost his last shreds of defense against despair.

_He heard the whine of the defibrillator charging up, saw the doctors clustered around, heard the thud as the charge was sent into the major's chest..._

_Heard Beckett give the order to try again..._

_And through it all, the long, high-pitched shriek of the monitor, matching the rising scream in his own mind and signalling that the Major was still, technically, dead._

_And as the seconds went on, and still nothing happened, Rodney could feel his new friend's life slipping away forever..._

_And there was nothing he could do to help him._

Rodney shuddered, remembering those few minutes in the Jumper all too vividly. It had taught him how much he valued the lives of those around him. And the life of Major John Sheppard particularly. Maybe the Major would never care to treat him as a friend, but at moments like that, he just didn't care.

There was something so eerily similar about the scenario being played out in front of him now. All the medics bending over the still form... And nothing Rodney, with all his science and all his knowledge, could do to help. He could only stand, and watch... And try to keep on hoping.

But while he watched the doctors busily inspecting John's arm, and preparing for the trip back to Atlantis, a little light rekindled in the dark world. They didn't seem to think it was hopeless yet. If it were definitely too late, they would hardly be acting that way, would they?

But then a nasty thought killed his new-found optimism: It was still his fault. And even if the Major did live through this somehow, Rodney wouldn't be the reason.

Everyone was helping except him! Aiden was briefing Beckett on the situation. Teyla was making herself useful to the medics. Rodney just watched. There was nothing for him to do. At least when he'd made such trouble on the planet with the ZedPM, he'd been able to do something to try to fix what he'd ruined.

But this time... He was just useless. No, he was worse than useless, because not only was he not helping - nothing would even have happened if it hadn't been for him.

Oh, what did it matter? If only the Major would get well again, he didn't care. Maybe he'd resign from the team. That would probably be a good idea. Then at least his stupid mistakes wouldn't put anyone in danger any longer. It would be better that way.

He watched the medical team bustling around the Major's prone figure. He didn't want this to happen, ever again. Yes, it would be better to stay away from the people he cared about, before he did something no one could fix.

Carson Beckett injected a stimulant into Sheppard's left arm. The man was pretty badly off, but he was responding well. Lieutenant Ford had done well to try to get the poison out before it had been in his system too long. And Rodney had, according to Teyla, brought John back to the Stargate in amazing time. He'd also applied a tourniquet, and radioed in ahead for help.

In cases like this, it was good thinking and quick reactions that counted. And Sheppard's team had done everything anyone could have done, and done it all well.

And because of that, it looked like Major Sheppard was going to be all right.

Beckett left John to the rest of the doctors, and spoke to Teyla and Aiden, who were standing close by, watching worriedly. "Well," he told them, and there was a cheerful note in his voice that made them brighten up immediately, "he's not out of the woods yet - but I think he's going to be fine."

Teyla's face relaxed into a relieved smile, and Aiden gave a huge, shining grin.

"If you hadn't reacted so quickly, it might be a different matter. But the venom seems to be non-persistent, and with careful watching for a little while, he should make a full recovery."

He smiled at the two, then realised something.

"Where's Rodney?"

Aiden and Teyla exchanged a glance, and Aiden motioned with his head to where the scientist was standing, off by himself.

That wasn't like Rodney, and Carson could see that his teammates were thinking the same thing.

Teyla shook her head, concern in her face again. "He believes this to be his fault."

Beckett continued to look at Rodney's lonely, motionless figure. "Would you like to tell him the good news, that the Major's out of immediate danger?"

"Tell him yourself, doc," Aiden suggested in a subdued tone. "He might listen to you more than he would to us."

Beckett nodded, and walked over to where McKay was standing. "Rodney?"

Rodney shook himself a little, like someone coming out of a trance, and blinked at the medical doctor. He didn't answer, and there was such a deeply anxious expression in his eyes that Beckett felt a twinge of alarm.

Carson laid a hand on his friend's arm. "He's still got a ways to go, but we think the Major's going to be just fine, Rodney."

Rodney's eyes lit up, but he asked disbelievingly, "Really?"

"Yes, Rodney," Carson replied gently, surprised again at the look of joy that this provoked. "He should be out of danger now, thanks to you and Lt. Ford and Teyla."

Rodney didn't hear the last sentence. He wasn't listening any more. He was smiling as hard as he could, an uncontrollable, honest smile. All he could think of was that the Major was actually going to be all right. Really all right! It was unbelievable, but apparently it was true. And Rodney sure wasn't going to argue. ./p

He hardly noticed as Beckett moved away, going back to where his team still hovered over their recovering patient.

He hadn't really thought it could turn out all right; and still it had, after all. And Rodney found himself being very, very thankful for that.

He noticed Teyla coming towards him from where she had been standing by John. "Dr. McKay," she said with a kind smile, "Major Sheppard is conscious."

"What, really?" he asked her, with a look that almost amounted to fear. "He is?"

"Yes," she nodded. Rodney stood for a minute, looking confused and opening and closing his mouth without saying anything.

How could he be awake already? Wasn't that impossible? What would he say?

The questions raced around in his head, one emotion following another. But it all stopped as he felt a small hand unexpectedly slip into his own.

Teyla was looking up at him, a smile on her face, and her brown hand holding his. "Come and see, Dr. McKay."

Rodney let himself be led to where John was lying on a stretcher, surrounded by doctors. Rodney had a brief impression of Carson's gaze on him, and Aiden grinning. Then he was looking down at John.

He was still very pale, and Rodney glanced concernedly at the bandage around his right arm. But he no longer had that look, the look of someone mortally ill. Rodney couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something that looked so much... better about him already. He smiled to himself. Now he could believe it.

And the best thing of all, was that the Major's eyes were open, and they most certainly weren't the eyes of a man who was dying. He was staring up at Rodney with an attempt at normalcy slightly hampered by his physical weakness.

"How - how do you feel?" Rodney heard himself ask inanely.

"Lousy," John answered deliberately in a low voice.

Rodney's face fell.

"But lousy's a lot better than dead."

Rodney's smile came back again. He cleared his throat, a little of his usual manner starting to come back. "Yes. Good." He really didn't know what to say.

"I heard what you did," John said, turning serious. "Thanks, McKay."

Rodney felt the guilt return, along with a lot of confusion that John should be thanking him of all people. He waved one hand around nervously, trying to explain. "No, no! Um, it was Teyla and Ford and Carson... I couldn't... I didn't do anything."

John raised his eyebrows a bit. From what he'd heard, and what little he remembered, that wasn't quite right. And now Rodney's unhappy eyes were staring down at him, and his right hand was still up in the air, waiting to see if John understood.

John managed a little grin. "Then thanks for nothing."

Rodney flushed, and smiled a small smile. Then the sad look came back, and he shifted from one foot to the other, avoiding the Major's inquiring eyes.

"Major, I... I just wanted to say..." His gaze came up again to lock directly with John's. "I'm sorry."

John saw the real contrition in the scientist's face, and even though he knew Rodney didn't have anything to apologise for, he answered, "It's all right."

Rodney let out a deep breath, and turned away, suddenly feeling a little unequal to all this. He felt Aiden take his arm as Beckett called out to his team to get the Major back to Atlantis.

"You all right?"

"Fine," Rodney answered mechanically. The Major was fine, that was what mattered.

He started walking back to the Gate with Ford and Teyla, following the stretcher and the medics.

He still blamed himself. It had been his fault, his mistake that had caused this, and that hadn't changed just because it was all right now.

But at least the Major had forgiven him.

And Rodney swore that he would never, ever be the cause of anything like that again. No more stupid mistakes. No more doing things without thinking. No more putting others in danger.

And vowing that, he stepped through the event horizon back to Atlantis.

_  
End of Part I.  
TBC_

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_Author's Note: So... What do you think? Please send me a review if you liked/despised it. :) Part 2 of 3 is coming soon..._


	2. Part II: P6A260

A Friend In Need

Author's Note: Fourteen reviews! (Does a happy dance) Wow, you folks are too great:D

Elisa - Thank you so much! Again:) I really appreciated your review for No Picnic, too, by the way:) Hope you enjoy the rest of this fic... And then there are a few more lined up as well...  
dragonfairymaiden - Thank you! I love hearing my fics are well written... (Grins) :)  
peregrine - Yay, you liked my characterisation:) The rest is on its way...  
em - If you liked that whumping, wait till you see this chapeter... Heh heh... >:)  
angw - How right you are! Read on... :)  
rogue1503 - (Smiles happily at the compliments) Thanks so much:)  
L E McMurray - Actually, my favourite thing is trying to get into Rodney's head, so I'm glad you think it worked well. Thanks:)  
fififolle - I'm so glad you like it:) Yeah, I tried to give everyone something to do at some point... Wouldn't want Ford to get to feel left out! ;)  
Bayas - Thank you! I love writing John and Rodney sappy friendship fics... Glad you enjoy reading them. :)  
szhismine - Thanks so much! Part two, coming up:)  
LTwill - Here it is. Thanks, and hope you like this one, too:)  
parisindy - Thank you for the review, so glad you like it:)  
ESCotLoE - Wow, that is some nice shameless begging! (Cue Applause) Thanks, that felt great... :D Consider yourself rewarded with this next chapter. Ah, but remember: there are THREE parts...The angst ain't over yet! >:)  
Terri - Here's the next bit! I know, isn't he just adorable when he's being pathetic? Sniff... :)

Hm... Looks like FanFic has decided to have half of my exclamation points for lunch... Ah well, you get the picture anyway. ;)

I can't tell you all enough how much I enjoyed reading those reviews:) And now, to prove that flattery will get you everywhere in Sidera's World, here's Part Two of three... It's longer than the last one -_and_ it's more violent! >:D

* * *

**Part 2: P6A-260**

Rodney stepped out of the event horizon to see a world oddly familiar. He rolled his eyes. Trees, sky, even the area surrounding the Gate were strikingly similar to M7G-677. It had been a stupid planet, and Rodney really didn't feel like being reminded of it right now.

He snuck a glance at the Major where the man stood a little ways ahead, and pulled out his Ancient scanner, trying to keep his attentive gaze from being too noticeable to its subject. He'd told Carson that Sheppard shouldn't be on his feet yet, not after being poisoned by a nasty alien thing a mere week earlier. But Carson had just answered that he was the medical doctor around here, and the Major had recovered perfectly, no complications whatsoever. Besides which, he was a truly terrible patient.

Rodney had been disgusted. As if that was any reason to let him out of the infirmary early! It didn't occur to him, of course, that if the situation was reversed, he'd be saying exactly the opposite.

So Beckett had cleared John for off-world travel, provided he took it easy. Rodney had snorted at that, and gone to talk to Elizabeth instead. As if anyone could take it easy off-world! Whenever you wanted a nice, quiet mission, that was just when everything went horribly wrong. He'd known that already from reading the SGC mission reports, and recently he'd been learning it from personal experience as well.

Rodney sighed and shook his head as he saw John favor his right arm in a gesture to Ford. Elizabeth hadn't cooperated either. He'd tried to tell her that the Major couldn't be ready for this yet, that he ought to be in bed resting for a few days more, at least, but she hadn't listened. She'd decided that Beckett's word was law in such matters, which apparently meant that no one else got any input at all.

Rodney frowned. She'd even seemed amused about something. Elizabeth was strange sometimes. What was so funny about him trying to prevent someone who wasn't fit from overexerting themselves when they should be resting? It was a mistake, he was sure of it.

Rodney quickly lowered his gaze back to his scanner as he saw John turn in his direction. He shuffled uncomfortably as the soldier came nearer. If the Major ever found out what he'd been saying, Rodney would be humiliated for the rest of his life. And he wouldn't enjoy that.

"So... McKay."

"Mm?" Rodney replied, avoiding the other's eyes and attempting to look innocent.

"What's up?"

Rodney was surprised, and for a moment he actually looked into the Major's face. Then he realised that this was probably something to do with how he'd noticed him staring, so he got awkward again. He cleared his throat. "What do you mean?"

He caught the slight movement as John cocked his head. "Well, you've been awfully quiet for the past few days. And, if you'll excuse my saying so..." He trailed off, glancing over at Teyla and Ford from where there were watching. "That's not exactly normal for you."

"Yes, well..." Rodney waggled his head a little, not sure what to say. "I've been-" He caught himself just in time before admitting something along the lines of "tired", or even worse, "guilty" or "upset". "Busy!" he finished with a tad too much energy, and a sharpness that startled even him. He looked up, hoping he hadn't hurt the Major's feelings or anything.

He thought John looked slightly unhappy, and kicked himself mentally.

"All right," John said as he turned away. Rodney was frankly surprised at what he said next. "Ford, Teyla, stay here. McKay and I are going to go look for ZPMs."

"Sir?"

"What?"

John's reply was directed towards Rodney instead of Aiden. "I was under the impression," he said seriously, "that we needed ZPMs."

"Well, yes, but-"

"Okay. So we're going to look for them. Last planet we were on that looked like this had one, if you remember."

Rodney winced. _Don't remind me,_ pretty much summed up his feelings.

"Sir, are you sure? I mean, last time-"

"I know what happened last time, Lieutenant," Sheppard told his second-in-command calmly. "But we can't discontinue out search for a new power source just because we ran into some trouble on one planet."

Rodney stared some more. Suddenly, the Major was saying all the things he usually had to say himself. How very odd.

"Isn't that right, McKay?"

Rodney jumped as John addressed him. "Yes! Yes, of course... not."

Sheppard nodded at the confirmation, and turned back to Ford, who was definitely looking reservedly disapproving. "We won't be far off."

"Yes, sir."

Teyla spoke up next, diplomatically. "Major, I am concerned that you may not yet have recovered fully."

Rodney blinked. He would never have had the nerve to say that to anyone's face. Probably because the Major would bite his head off. But Teyla was immune to that kind of thing. In fact, Rodney concluded, he himself was the only person who was ever impolite to Teyla. But then, really, he was impolite to everyone.

John gave the girl half a smile. "I'll be fine, Teyla. Besides," his gaze shifted to Aiden, "we'll stay in radio contact. We need anything, you'll know about it. All right?"

Teyla considered this, her eyes lifted to some point above the treetops, for all the world as if it was ultimately her decision. Rodney could never quite understand why this sort of thing didn't offend the Major, but it didn't. Rodney stole a glance at him; he looked anything but offended.

"Very well," Teyla decided at last.

"Good," John said cheerfully. "We should be back soon anyway." He gestured to Rodney. "Right, McKay, let's get going."

Rodney was staring at him, and John paused when he noticed.

"McKay? Something wrong?"

Rodney hemmed and hawed, not sure how to say what he was thinking, or even quite what that was. There was something he wanted to say, he knew that.

"You all right?"

He saw John's collected gaze on him, and was painfully aware of Ford and Teyla also looking at him from behind.

"Well..." Rodney started, then lost his train of thought. He tried again. "Look, shouldn't we take Teyla and Ford?"

He could feel rather than see the raised eyebrows.

"What for?" Rodney was sure there was some kind of sarcasm - or something - in that tone, even though he couldn't hear it. There must be.

But he started to answer that one instinctively. "It's just that you-" He broke off abruptly, realising what it was he'd almost admitted to, that he was still worried about the Major's well-being. Especially, he thought, with himself as the only help should something go wrong. That had been the trouble last time, and he really, really didn't want to do that again.

He gulped. He couldn't say that! "Maybe you should take someone else instead of me." It came out all in a rush.

But Sheppard wasn't taking the hint. "Well, you're the one with the Ancient thing."

"True," Rodney conceded, unhappy with his inability to make the Major understand. He thought of saying that anyone else could use it, because it was easy to detect power traces and deduce that they originated from a ZedPM, but dismissed the idea again immediately. Because, actually, it wasn't easy.

He felt a hand on his arm, and almost jerked himself away from it when he saw that it was the Major. "We'll be fine, McKay. There can't be poisonous aliens waiting for us on every planet, you know."

Rodney opened and closed his mouth a few times. It wasn't just the poisonous aliens. Anything that happened, he would be the least possible help. Ford or Teyla could do so much more! And it just shouldn't be happening this way, because every minute the Major was alone with him, was a minute that Sheppard's life was in danger.

"Look, Major, I think you ought to take someone else along." The words came out before he could stop them.

"Why?"

"Well, because..." He looked up to the sky for inspiration, and also to avoid the Major's too-direct eyes. "If something does happen, I-" Once again, he caught himself just in time. Oh, he didn't even want to think of how they'd laugh at him if he had finished that sentence!

He ducked his head, suddenly changing moods, and snapped out, "Never mind!"

"All right then," he heard the Major say. "Let's go."

He started to walk off with a nod to Aiden and Teyla, and Rodney automatically followed, lapsing into thought.

He didn't know why he kept doing things like that. Honestly, it had never been hard to hide how he felt in the past. Why the multiple almost-slips now?

He decided it was probably just his desperate attempts to feel wanted again. Pathetic. The Major didn't want him, least of all after what had happed on their last mission, and Rodney understood that. It didn't hurt him at all. Of course. He was used to that. He'd gotten over things like that years and years - actually, decades ago.

Really, he had.

Part of him cynically whispered that he wasn't even fooling himself, but he ignored it, and just kept on walking and staring down at the scanner.

Pretty soon, he'd be safely indifferent to the Major again, and to everyone else as well, and then he wouldn't have to worry about this.

He'd tried, back in Atlantis, when the major was well enough to talk, to ask to be transferred off the Team... But John had cut him off before he'd had a chance to work himself up to it, and changed the subject. And Rodney just hadn't had the nerve to bring it up again.

But there was still something he could do to protect those around him, and to protect himself, too. He could hold himself aloof. He had let some of his painstakingly constructed reserve slip away lately, and he wasn't going to let it happen again. If he discouraged all friendly advances - or what his mind wishfully told him were "friendly", which was ridiculous - then people would stay away from him, and they wouldn't get hurt by his stupid mistakes any more.

And he wouldn't have to feel guilty any longer.

He wouldn't be forced into situations like this one.

But he'd found that the facade was disturbingly difficult to erect again after it had been partially torn down.

He just had to keep telling himself that he wasn't losing anything. No one actually wanted him around, so a little rudeness should discourage them. And that shouldn't be too hard for him, he thought bitterly, recalling all the people in his past who had told him repeatedly how rude and difficult to get along with he was.

If they didn't need information from him, no one would ever talk to him at all, he reminded himself. Certainly, they'd never dream of actually starting a conversation with him, just for the sake of chatting. The day that happened, he'd probably have a heart attack, he concluded cynically.

John eyed Rodney as they continued walking. The scientist was tramping along next to him, looking down fixedly at the Ancient device he was holding, and obviously not seeing it at all. John watched the expressions coming and going over Rodney's lowered face. It looked as if two different parts of him were having an argument. If there were a brick wall up ahead, John thought with a grin, Rodney probably wouldn't notice until he crashed into it. Maybe not even then, actually.

John shook his head slightly. McKay hadn't been acting like himself since that... poison incident. He'd been too silent, too reserved, and he snapped at people suddenly for no reason.

After a conversation with Dr. Weir, John had concluded that it was worry, of all things, that was making McKay behave that way. And for him, no less.

Weir had told him how Rodney had made such an impassioned case for John's staying in Atlantis a little longer. And despite the fact that the last thing he wanted was to be cooped up for a single day more, he'd been rather touched by that.

Not that he'd ever admit that to McKay. Nope, he'd sooner be dead.

Still, it had showed him once again that McKay wasn't so bad if you got past his unsavory exterior. He was appallingly rude and arrogant, and there were days when he literally did nothing but complain. And he was a genius, of course; everyone knew that. But recently, John had been seeing some of his hidden depths, and they always surprised him.

And no matter how you looked at it, McKay had saved his life back on that planet. The least he could do was be friendly in return, when the scientist was obviously upset about something.

John accordingly glanced at Rodney again, in time to see one side of his mouth tilt up in a private sneer. He decided to say something, get Rodney to talk, instead of holding imaginary conversations with himself.

"So, been doing anything interesting?"

The self-derision vanished in a instant, and the grey eyes that snapped up to meet Sheppard's now held nothing but total shock. "What?"

"Well, you said you'd been busy lately; I was wondering if it was anything interesting."

He watched as Rodney came to a halt, and waved his hands around, blinking helplessly, just as if that were the single last thing he'd been expecting to hear. He finally got a response out, though it wasn't much of one. "What?" he asked again.

John gave him an amused look. You'd think the man had never had a conversation in his life. Come to think of it, he probably

hadn't

had that many normal conversations... "Just a question, McKay," he said, keeping his tone friendly.

Rodney's head went back and his jaw set, the eyes losing most of their expression. "Oh, of course. Why did you want to know?"

"Just trying to make conversation," John told him honestly.

The head came down again, and the look of surprise returned as Rodney stared at Sheppard with his mouth open. "Why?" he finally gasped. John gave him a very strange look. Rodney seemed to realise how odd that must have sounded and waved one hand around. "Sorry... Stupid thing to say."

Sheppard was tempted to say that, Yes, it had been - but he knew now wasn't the time for that.

He watched as Rodney regained a partial grasp on reality. "What was the question again?"

"Wanted to know if you'd been doing anything interesting lately."

He watched as Rodney, almost nervously, started to smile. "Well, actually..." he began.

He launched into a long, technical description of something they'd found in one of the labs of Atlantis, growing more and more animated as he went on. John didn't understand most of it - actually, that was an understatement - but it had a lot to do with Ancient databases, quantum physics, and, apparently, Kavanagh. John somehow managed to pay attention even though he didn't have a clue what the astrophysicist was talking about most of the time. Rodney was obviously enjoying letting some of this out, so John was happy to oblige.

John tipped his head to one side, watching the scientist, who had somehow neglected to start walking again. Rodney's hands were going almost as quickly as his tongue, and though his eyes were mostly turned to the surrounding trees, they'd lost their unhappy squint. And he was smiling, something John realised he hadn't seen in a while. In fact, he looked more like a happy kid than he had since they'd first come to Atlantis.

Which was understandable. McKay was head of the science division, which was by far the largest of the three the Atlantis expedition had been divided into. And, in a way, it was also the one that carried the most responsibility. The City was thousands of years old, and held all kinds of things that most of humanity couldn't begin to understand to save their lives. And that was the scientists' job; they were always at it, trying to decipher the secrets of this or that device.

And McKay had to organise it all, keep his finger on all the strings at once, and to make sure nothing went wrong. Sheppard suddenly began to comprehend Rodney's apparent relief at going off-world occasionally. He must never get to relax while in Atlantis itself. Not that most missions were exactly relaxing, but still, any change must seem like a good thing sometimes.

And, of course, there was also the fact that very few - okay, maybe none - of the people he worked with all the time actually liked being around him. Which was also understandable. John had seen the way he treated his research teams, and it wasn't a very pretty sight. And Rodney wasn't much more agreeable on a personal basis either.

John hadn't really considered all this before, because McKay always seemed to be so... self-sufficient. He didn't seem to need anyone else, in any way, shape, or form. And he very often gave the impression of having no use for people, period. But everyone needs someone, and John knew from experience that responsibility is a very wearing thing. And now he decided that if McKay wasn't actually showing the strain - well, then he was hiding it.

And maybe that incident with the poisonous alien thing had just been the last straw.

So maybe he just needed a friend, someone to talk to. Hey, everyone did now and then. And, as far as John was concerned, everyone deserved the chance at one.

Rodney was still talking. "As if just throwing the laws of thermodynamics out the window would solve all our problems... Please! And the man calls himself a physicist!" Rodney let out a derisive snort. "Do you believe that, Major?"

John noticed the grey eyes looking up at him, and roused himself from his train of thought to answer. "Right." He gave a few exaggerated nods, just to punctuate his agreement.

Rodney's eyes narrowed, but the hint of a smile didn't go away. "You know, Major, I don't believe you understood a word of what I've been telling you."

John pretended to look offended. "Course I did!"

Rodney made a little noise to himself, as if he was enjoying this, and kept up his derogatory remarks. "Not surprising. I wouldn't have expected you to, Major."

"Then why were you telling me?" Sheppard raised his eyebrows in a gotcha-there kind of look. If it was the insult game, well, he could play that.

"Because, Major," McKay responded without missing a beat, "someone needs to cultivate your ignorant military mind, and I have decided, out of the goodness of my heart, to take up the task myself. Though I imagine, since it's you we're discussing, Major, that my efforts will be in vain. Still, there's a certain nobility in pursuing a hopeless cause, or so I hear, though personally -"

"Hey, that mean something?"

Rodney looked confused. "What? Does what mean something?"

"That." John pointed at the screen of the Ancient scanner, which he'd noticed was exhibiting all sorts of text and blinking images.

"Huh!" Rodney bent over the device again, which he had forgotten about during his mostly-one-sided conversation with Sheppard. "Yes, actually, it does."

John tried to look, too; even though he knew he wouldn't understand it, he wanted to see for himself. Nope, that didn't mean anything to him. He stole a glance at McKay, whose eyes were darting over the cryptic alien gibberish. Well, they were both looking at the same thing, and McKay did understand it. Just making sure. He would have to ask after all. "So what does it mean?"

There was a funny glow in Rodney's eyes now as he looked up. "There's a power source somewhere around here." He glanced at the screen again, then pointed. "That way."

Rodney looked expectantly at the Major, and thought several things all at once. Was it a ZedPM? Could be, he couldn't tell how far away it was yet, and something seemed to be interfering with the readings. Localised, maybe mineral deposits or something. Too bad he hadn't had this scanner on M7G-677... No, he didn't want to think about M7G-677. Don't go there. This planet was already disturbingly similar, and now it had a power source, too. Well, he was not going to do anything stupid this time. So it would be fine.

He listened to the Major updating Ford and Teyla on the power source and their position. Not that he needed to: this planet looked about as harmful as a walk in the park. Which, of course, didn't necessarily preclude the possibility of something going wrong - you could get killed walking in the park. It was just highly unlikely. You could run into a rabid dog, or someone who really, really didn't like you, or possibly... Oh, the Major was finished now.

"Right, McKay..." Sheppard made a wide gesture, but with his left arm rather than his right, Rodney noticed guiltily. "Lead on."

Rodney did so, watching as the readings got steadily stronger with every step he took. Yes, something was definitely causing localised interference, and the power source was quite close by.

Not a ZedPM though, he concluded disappointedly. The readings weren't nearly strong enough, and they would be from this distance. Still, definitely worth having a look. Almost anything was, especially if you'd travelled all the way to another galaxy just to see what was there.

"Well," he informed the Major, his gaze still glued to the screen of the scanner, "the bad news is that it's definitely not a ZedPM. However, the good news is that we won't have to walk much farther-" He heard a snort of laughter from the Major's direction, which he ignored, because he was too busy to think of a fitting response right now. "The power should be coming from right over here..."

Abruptly, the trees stopped, and John and Rodney found themselves right in the middle of some fairly extensive ruins before they'd even seen them coming.

Rodney groaned, letting his arms fall to his sides. "Oh, this is so totally deja vu!"

Sheppard nodded.'

Trees, power source, ruins... It was M7G-677 all over again. All they needed now were a whole bunch of kids with arrows, and a couple of Wraith probes.

And, Rodney completed the mental tally, a few very dumb and almost fatal mistakes on his part.

Gloomily staring at his scanner, he heard Sheppard talk into his radio. "Ford."

He waited a minute. No answer.

"Ford, come in," he tried again.

Nothing.

"Lieutenant, do you read?"

Still nothing.

"Oh!" Rodney suddenly realised something.

"What?"

"Well, when I first picked up the readings, it looked like there was some kind of... Well, I couldn't be sure, but-"

"What!" Sheppard asked again.

Rodney blinked. Why did he have to be so snappy about it? He piled an extra load of patience onto his tone. "Something in these ruins seems to block energy waves."

"And you didn't think to mention this, because...?"

"How was I to know it would affect the radios? Seriously, Major, I can't predict the future."

John made a face. Rodney caught him at it, and frowned back, going into grumpy mode again. Looking back at his scanner, he marched off without a word.

John rolled his eyes, deciding he was entitled to it, and followed Rodney.

They got practically to the middle of the ruins before McKay spoke again. "There, that should be it."

John glanced around, not seeing anything promising. "Where?"

"Right where I'm pointing. Are you blind, or what?"

"I'm not blind, I just don't see anything that looks like a power source."

"Well, what do you expect? A big flashing sign reading, 'Attention, Power Source Here'?"

"I'm just saying." He walked towards the spot, where there was nothing to be seen but a lot of grass. Rodney went with him, still talking.

"Well, what you're saying has very little actual content, it seems to me. I mean, I'm telling you there's a power source here, and since I happen to be the one with the PhD in physics and the alien device for detecting energy signatures, I think you might take my word for it. It isn't as if I had anything to gain by telling you the wrong place." His tone became mocking. "'Oh, fooled you, Major! The power source is actually behind you. Isn't that funny?'" He went back to being grumpy. "Maybe you have time for games; I don't."

John wasn't stupid, and he caught on to the fact that this was an indication of the strain of responsibility. Luckily, he had an almost infinite amount of patience under normal circumstances. "Sure you do, McKay. Everyone has time for games." He gave one of his friendliest smiles, which he was sure McKay saw, even though the scientist was pretending not to pay attention. "In fact, Ford and I have been teaching Teyla to play cards. Why don't you come along tonight?"

"I'm busy."

"You can't always be busy."

"I can see how the concept might be incomprehensible to you, Major, but I assure you that a man in my position can most certainly always be busy." Almost without changing his tone, he added, "There. Right here." He looked up at John, apparently forgetting that he was in the middle of a fight with him. "It's underground. We must be standing right on top of it."

John frowned, but before he had a chance to reply, there was a slight tremor beneath their feet.

Rodney froze, looking scared. "What was that?"

It took about two seconds for it to click, for John to be sure. Two seconds too long... He started to yell for McKay to run, but it was already too late.

In a terrifying wave of dirt and noise, the ground fell away beneath them...

... And the next thing John was aware of was a strange muddle of sounds and sensations. They didn't seem to have any distinct identities of their own; they were just what there was, apparently, for now. Not that time was distinguishable in the overall mess either.

With some amount of effort, John separated some of the elements combining to create such a bewildering whole: darkness, pain, something hard against his back, and an insistent, panicky voice...

The voice was saying words now. "Major! Major, are you all right? Say something! Major, answer me!"

The words didn't make much sense, though, and John didn't really feel like trying to figure out what it all meant. It probably didn't mean anything.

Something was moving, and then John felt fingers pressed precisely to his wrist. A sigh of relief from the voice next to him, and then the hands moving him. Suddenly, the pain, which had been sort of in the background with everything else, flared into too-clear existence.

John groaned.

"Major?"

The pain had roused John somewhat from the limbo of semi-consciousness, and he knew now who the voice belonged to. He also knew exactly where he hurt the most, which was nice.

"McKay?"

"Major, can you open your eyes?"

He tried a little. "Don't think so..."

"Major, I think you may have a concussion, so I need to make sure that your pupils are equal and responding." A sound of dirt shifting next to him. "You're going to have to open your eyes."

Painfully, John did so. If he'd had more breath to spare, he would have remarked on how it was a lot harder than it sounded. He gritted his teeth as a very bright light blinded him momentarily.

"All right, Major. They look fine. I'm guessing it's only a minor concussion."

John was looking around, willing himself to take stock of his surroundings. As his sight adjusted to the darkness, he realised that it wasn't really terribly dark after all. There was a large hole above them, and there was plenty of light coming in...

A hole, and they were at the bottom of it.

The landslide.

He turned to the scientist still hovering over him.

"McKay? You all right?"

He saw that Rodney was covered in dirt; any other time, he would have felt like laughing. And he himself probably looked pretty much the same. Great. He'd have to take another shower when he got back to Atlantis.

McKay was waving one hand around. "Oh, yeah, pretty much. Dirty, few bruises... But what am I talking about? You're the one with the concussion."

John started to acknowledge McKay's good point with a head movement, but thankfully thought better of it in time.

He looked towards the top of the hole. Actually, the slope wasn't that steep, and it certainly wasn't straight up and down. "We might be able to climb out."

McKay glanced over his shoulder. "Yes, I thought of that. But I doubt I could drag you."

John wrinkled his forehead. No, that wouldn't work. Then there was only one solution. "I can make it..." He started to drag himself up, and Rodney hardly had time to get the beginnings of a protest out before a sudden pain in his right arm made John give up.

He squinted at it. Not broken, he could tell that much. It would hurt a lot worse. But it wouldn't move right, and it was hanging at a funny angle.

McKay had started feeling around the joint of his shoulder. "I think you've dislocated your arm."

"Great."

"Yes."

John knew he could never get out with one arm useless, and he could see that Rodney knew it, too. He fingered his radio with his left hand. "Lieutenant, come in."

There was only static in reply.

"Yes, and the, uh, radios still seem to be out of order. I think it's probably mineral deposits, maybe naturally occurring, which the Ancients utilised as a sort of defense. Probably picked this planet and this specific location in hopes of masking their outpost from the Wraiths' sensors..."

John let him rattle on. The scientist's mind was obviously not on mineral deposits.

Rodney trailed off. "How do you feel?"

"For a guy with a dislocated shoulder and a concussion lying at the bottom of a hole... Not so bad."

"Ford and Teyla will come looking for us soon, won't they?"

"Yeah, but personally," John looked up at Rodney, "I don't feel like waiting here that long."

"So what do we do? Fly out of here?"

Well... John had thought of something. He didn't like it, and he knew McKay wouldn't like it either, but it was a solution. It wasn't as if his arm was broken...

He cleared his throat. "You think you could reset my arm?" He tried to sound casual about it, but McKay wasn't buying the act.

"What! Me! But, I don't know how, I have absolutely no medical training, what if I hurt you more?"

John waited for Rodney's initial panic reaction to die down. "It's easy, anyone could do it."

"Oh, sure!"

"No, really. You just pop it back into the socket. Can't go wrong." This wasn't technically true, but John was willing to take his chances.

Rodney was looking at him in open disbelief now. "You want me to?"

"Yep."

"Oh... Well... All right then... But you're going to have to tell me what to do."

John tried not to look nervous; that wouldn't help McKay. "Right," he said. "Now, you just take it, and pop it back into place."

Rodney had his hands around John's arm and shoulder now, but he still wasn't doing anything. John could feel the scientist's fingers gently clasping and unclasping. It wasn't hurting at all: McKay was strangely good at being careful. Probably due to all those alien thingies he was always working on.

"Oh, well then!" Rodney mocked half-heartedly; then he sighed. "Do you think you could be a little more specific?"

"That's really all there is to it."

"Oh."

Rodney was blaming himself again. If he'd been paying more attention, if he'd been more careful, if he hadn't let John draw him out - again - the Major wouldn't be in this mess. Granted, he himself would be anyway, but that really wasn't the point. The point was that he'd failed yet again, and if he had just held on to his resolve to discourage all friendly advances - which maybe really were meant to be friendly after all - the Major might not have followed him and fallen down this hole.

He didn't know what to say. He hated to ask for forgiveness for the second time in a week for almost killing the Major, especially when they weren't out of danger yet. Not by a long shot. And now the Major wanted him to try to fix his arm. As if he could fix anything! But Sheppard just wouldn't take "No" for an answer.

Rodney couldn't see any way out. And maybe it would be easy after all. Maybe.

He started.

John gritted his teeth, but Rodney was very, very thankful to see that he didn't look like passing out again. So hopefully, he wasn't really hurting John as much as he thought he was.

Weren't you supposed to keep them talking or something when you did things like this?

Rodney couldn't think of a thing to talk about. At least, not anything helpful.

How about card games? Yes, the major had invited him to come play cards with the rest of the team. Rodney had known they were doing that, but he'd always opted out, preferring his work to pushing himself on people and spoiling their fun. And there was certainly always plenty of work to do.

But the fact that the Major had asked him... Well, he had actually seemed to mean it, and Rodney had made sure not to let on how much it had made him hope that he wasn't entirely unwanted. Because he shouldn't hope that. Look what happened to people he just talked to!

Anyway, cards, right. It would do for a conversation topic.

Still focussing on trying to feel his way to resetting the joint, Rodney made an attempt at giving the Major something else to think about. "So, Major, you said you and Ford have been teaching Teyla cards."

"Yeah!" A gasp, a little too violent. Rodney wished he could stop, because he hated to be causing the Major more pain, and deliberately at that. But he just went on.

"What game, exactly?"

"Poker. We taught her poker. She's pretty good at it." He raised his eyebrows in a surprised expression. "After she got the point of it."

Rodney was fairly happy to note that his distraction seemed to be helping a little. He went on talking. "I've never been very good at poker, actually."

John's hazel eyes came up unexpectedly to meet his own. Disturbingly, they seemed to read everything in an instant. Everything Rodney was trying to hide from him. The one thing he knew was that you never let on how worried you were to the patient, and he suddenly thought that he wasn't doing a very good job.

"Yeah, I got that," he heard John say. Rodney had already turned his eyes somewhere else. Oh, he was so screwing this up...

Unexpectedly, John spoke again. "So, you gonna come tonight, or what?"

Rodney shrugged. "I doubt you'll be playing tonight. Beckett doesn't really like crowds in the infirmary."

"Not gonna be in the infirmary," John stated with determination.

Rodney glanced at him unhappily. "Right..." He wasn't doing this right, he could tell. If the Major wasn't in the infirmary for days, it wouldn't be because of his help.

"Nope, not going back there." The Major was trying to ignore the pain, to pretend it wasn't there. He was doing a very good job of it, too, apparently. He quirked his eyebrows a little pathetically. "I just got out of there."

"I know," was all Rodney was up to saying. He just couldn't feel the way to move the bones. He was afraid he was making it worse. It was obviously hurting the Major...

Rodney was the first to admit that he didn't know about people: he had never been very talented at figuring what made humanity tick, socially, psychologically, or physically. He understood things that followed rules, things you could take apart, whether literally or figuratively, mess around with, and throw back together again with a few changes to make them work even better than before.

His life, for years and years now, had been a life of machines, mathematics, and material laws. The stuff of the Universe that made sense. The stuff that was safe. And now, suddenly, he'd been launched unceremoniously into the world of people: he was on a team, he had dared to hope he had friends... Though this did come with the price of being expected to be polite some of the time... Who knew he'd have more of a social life stranded in another galaxy?

He'd been trying to do it right, to make it work... But people just weren't like that. And worst of all, these people, his team, had come to depend of him. And sure, give him an alien device, and he was good to go... Actually no, he amended mentally, he wasn't all that good at those either, was he? But he was absolutely no help at all with a human being. Once you broke a person, you couldn't just wire him back together, and replace the casing.

And McKay broke everything he touched, he thought gloomily.

Honestly, this was really Beckett's department. Rodney considered saying that to John, but one look at the soldier told him it wouldn't be considered a helpful remark. He could feel the bones underneath the flesh and muscle. He tried to concentrate on that, to move it back into place... Oh, who was he fooling? He didn't know enough, wasn't the least bit qualified. Why had he let the Major talk him into doing this in the first place?

Then his hands slipped, and John finally did let out a grunt of pain. His eyes shut very hard, and his left hand started clenching and unclenching. Rodney could see the knuckles turn white when it was in a fist. He backed away a little, as if his mere proximity could make things worse, which was more or less his opinion at this point.

"I can't do this." It was hardly more than a whisper, and still the Major somehow heard it.

"You're doin' good," he told Rodney, but his eyes didn't open, and the creases of pain were still very visible on his forehead.

Rodney shook his head. He meant it. He simply could not do it. It wasn't his thing, and he'd just make everything worse, and that wasn't what he wanted at all.

"No," he said. "No, I'm not. I'm not helping, for all I know I could be complicating your injuries -"

"McKay!"

"No!" He knew he was letting it show too much, but he couldn't stop now. "No, Major, I am not going to hurt you more!"

Now the Major's eyes did open, and he looked up at Rodney with total sincerity, something Rodney found a little unsettling. Especially because there wasn't the least bit of anger or blame, and, oh, there should have been... Why wouldn't he understand that this was all Rodney's fault?

"I can't do it." Rodney made it a statement, pure and simple.

"There isn't any other way."

But there was. Something Rodney had thought of back when he'd first regained consciousness to find himself half buried, but physically fine, and the Major out cold on the other side of the pit.

"I could climb out and get help."

He watched for the Major's reaction, and couldn't tell how his plan had gone over. He didn't like to leave him alone... But if he could just get beyond the ruins, he could radio to Teyla and Ford...

"And get Teyla and Ford to drag me out of here."

"Something like that, yes."

John sighed, and Rodney could see that he didn't like it for one reason or another. But he didn't say why. He just said, "Okay, go."

"Right." Rodney got up, ignoring the stiffness of his legs and arms, and walked over to where the dirt started slanting upwards. It did look pretty steep... But he was sure he could make it. He stood there, rubbing his hands together nervously and trying to determine if there was any way up that was better than the rest.

"You can do it, McKay."

Rodney wheeled around, then looked back again. "Yes, right," he said, and he wasn't being sarcastic, just accepting the encouragement in the spirit it had been offered.

Left to himself, Rodney would never have even tried to climb out. Well, maybe he would if he were stuck here, but he sure wouldn't as a hobby. But if the Major thought it could be done, then he'd do it. He'd have to. Maybe that would show everyone that he wasn't useless, that he could help fix what he'd screwed up.

He started to climb, feeling John's eyes drilling into him from behind. He had to do this to help the Major.

He was already halfway up when the dirt shifted beneath him the first time. He grabbed on to a rock in time to save himself from falling, but the sensation had been very disturbing.

"You all right, McKay?"

Rodney caught his breath, at least almost, and shouted back, "Yes, but this slope seems to be pretty unstable. I'm not sure if I can-"

"You'll be fine," came the calming voice from behind him. "Just keep going, you're more than halfway there."

Rodney was grateful for the moral support. The Major had faith in him. Well, he wasn't going to disappoint him. He wasn't going to fail again, not when he had a chance to be useful.

He kept climbing.

There were more and more slidings beneath his feet as he got higher up and the slope became steeper. But he always managed to retain his balance somehow. And it was good to be fighting for a goal, to have something to do, some way to help.

The Major occasionally contributed something cheerful from his position on the "floor" of the pit. And Rodney always appreciated it, though he never said so, of course.

Now Rodney was almost at the top. The last couple of feet, however, were completely vertical, so he'd have to reach for it and haul himself over the edge. Clinging to the rather unsteady dirt and rock beneath him, he tried to nerve himself to do it. He knew he had to, but it just seemed like such a bad idea...

"By the way," the Major said from behind and beneath Rodney, "how come _you_ didn't get a concussion and a dislocated shoulder?"

Rodney remembered the shove which had sent him out of the worst of it at the last possible second and gulped. Yet another one he owed the Major, and which he could never, ever repay. "Actually," he answered, "you pushed me."

"Don't remember doing that."

"Well, you can take it from me, you did."

"Go me."

"Yes."

A long pause as Rodney considered the edge of turf so close above him. He decided to add something to that last bit of conversation. "Thank you. By the way."

"No problem, McKay."

Oh, yes, Rodney definitely had to get out of here. No matter what. Because otherwise, he wouldn't be able to live with himself.

"Actually," Rodney shouted down as he reached for the ground above, "I think I will, uh, take you up on that invitation for tonight."

"Good." Rodney had grabbed the grass now, but that wasn't really much of a handhold. John was still talking. "Just don't bring along anything you care too much about, cause Teyla gets better every night."

Rodney laughed absentmindedly. He really wasn't sure if he could pull himself up using just the grass as a support. But the ground was slipping out from under him, and it was now or never. He pulled, and got almost over the edge, when the whole world just seemed to implode all of a sudden.

Then he was sitting upright, and he knew that he was at the bottom of the hole again. He was staring at the Major, across from him, and had a distinct sense of having done all this before.

The Major was shouting something at him, but he couldn't make it out. His own name, and something about... doing something. He really didn't feel up to doing anything. He wanted to tell the Major that, but his tongue just wouldn't work.

Besides which, the Major seemed to be so far away... Rodney was sure he couldn't shout that far. And he couldn't move either, which was odd.

Rodney was trying to get his bearings, but it was all so terribly confusing. He was sure there was something he should be doing, something that he should remember, but he had no idea what. And no way of finding out either.

Somehow, magically, his head cleared a little, and he remembered climbing... To help the Major. The Major was hurt. Rodney looked over at him, squinting a bit to bring things more into focus. It didn't help much, everything was still blurry. But now he could see that the Major was more than half buried in dirt and rubble. He was still shouting, and digging furiously and ineffectually with his good arm.

Rodney didn't know what the trouble was, but whatever it was, he knew it was his fault. All this was his fault. And now he was no use at all, because he couldn't even move. He couldn't help the Major. He never could.

"Rodney! Answer me!"

The sounds had started being words, which was vaguely interesting. Rodney wanted to ask what was the matter, but he couldn't say much, so all he managed was, "What?"

The sound of his own voice startled him, and he blinked a few times. It didn't even sound like him.

He was sure John couldn't have heard him from all that way away, but apparently he had, because he said something back. "McKay, stay with me."

Stay with him? He was with him. That was the whole trouble. Still, the Major didn't seem to understand that. "I'm here," Rodney told him, hoping John would explain what he meant.

"Good," said John. "Don't go anywhere, okay?"

Rodney wanted to ask him what this was all about, but he couldn't get enough words together at once to do it. And now everything was going so blurry... Like some kind of dark fog, rolling in at the edges of his vision, making the Major seem even further away...

"Rodney!"

Rodney jerked his head back up, and realised there was something very funny about the side of his face. He got one hand up to touch it, and it felt warm and wet... He stared down with a sort of impersonal wonderment at the red on his fingers through the fog.

"I'm bleeding." He was surprised, confused... And he didn't know why he wasn't more scared; he thought he should be. Because now he saw that the whole left side of him was red, and that wasn't good.

But, strangely, it didn't seem to matter very much. Nothing did. The fog was taking him away somewhere, and he'd just see what it was like when he got there. He couldn't think about it now.

"McKay, stay with me!" A forceful voice from somewhere outside the fog, and two intense hazel eyes holding his own.

_The Major._

But why did he want him to stay here? He couldn't help now, he was no good. He'd failed. He always failed.

"_Stay with me!"_

Rodney could see in the Major's eyes that he cared very much about this, but he didn't know why. His voice was like an anchor in all the shifting fog... But still, Rodney couldn't hold on... He was drifting away...

He wanted to tell the Major he was sorry, that he couldn't do it...

... He couldn't hold on any longer...

... He couldn't help him...

... He couldn't reset his arm...

... Couldn't climb out...

... Couldn't get him back to the Gate fast enough...

... Couldn't fix the device on M7G-677...

... He couldn't even tell him how sorry he was...

He'd failed so many times, and now he was failing again. And still he couldn't help it.

_I'm sorry..._

"_McKay! Rodney!"_

_Can't..._

And he saw the despair in the hazel eyes as the dark fog closed over him...

John hit the rubble so hard it hurt, but he didn't care. He felt terrible, but it didn't matter any more.

How could this be happening!

"RODNEY!"

But Rodney didn't answer. He'd slid down sideways, and after that one, final, wide-eyed, pleading stare, his eyes had fallen shut... And they didn't reopen.

John told himself that he was wrong to think that they never would...

"C'mon, McKay, don't do this...!" John bit back a moan and scrabbled with his one good arm at the rubble that had trapped him. But it didn't do any good. He was well and truly stuck.

He'd been so sure McKay could make it out. He'd watched the scientist somehow get to the top, never giving up when almost anyone else would have called it a day long before. The dogged determination of the man was just astounding. And Sheppard had congratulated himself anew on picking someone like that to be on his team.

But then it had all fallen apart, literally, at the very last minute. The area had still been unstable. John knew he should have thought of that. If he hadn't had a concussion, he probably would have; but that didn't help now.

Second thoughts hadn't made a bit of difference when tons of dirt suddenly came crashing down, half-burying Sheppard, and dropping McKay twenty feet with a lot of very hard rocks for company.

He'd watched Rodney regain consciousness very briefly. Watched him go out again.

And now he was watching as he slowly bled his life away onto the cold ground from a wound on his head.

And he couldn't reach him.

A dozen feet away, and there was absolutely nothing he could do.

And there was such a lot of blood...

Blood all over the side of Rodney's face, blood soaking his tan jacket... Red covering the stones beneath him... More and more of it all the time...

"Dammit! Rodney..." It was only a whisper now. No good in shouting any more, because there was no one who could hear him.

No McKay to make a smart-alec response.

John buried his head in the crook of his arm. Where had it all gone wrong? What had he done to cause this? Answers came back quickly enough.

He should have been paying more attention, should have been thinking faster, should have known that where McKay went, trouble followed. He should have been more careful. That was his job, what he was here for.

And he'd failed miserably at it.

Worst of all, he'd put one of his team at even greater risk in an already-bad situation. Why had he ever let McKay try to climb out on his own? It hadn't seemed like such a bad idea at the time, but now... It had just been dumb. He should have stopped him. Ford and Teyla would have shown up soon enough...

But now it wouldn't be soon enough. Rodney was dying.

He'd failed, and Rodney was paying for it with his life.

John looked up again, saw Rodney where he lay at the other end of the pit. Out of reach, just too far from help... Saw the blood everywhere... Time was running out for Rodney, and John knew it. But it was too late now. Too late to make up for his mistakes.

It shouldn't have been this way. It wouldn't have been, except for him. John knew it was all his fault.

He'd never forgive himself. He'd never trust himself again now. McKay had trusted him, and look what had happened.

"McKay..."

John was surprised to hear that he'd said it out loud. Just an uncertain breath of a word. A name, the name of someone who had been... his friend, really, though he hadn't realised that in so many words. The name of the friend he'd led to his doom.

There was only one thing left for him to do now; and it was too late to do even that right. But John said it anyway, because it was all he had left to give.

His voice became steady and clear as he told Rodney that last, all-important thing.

"I'm sorry."

If only Rodney could actually hear him... But he couldn't, and there was nothing John could do to change that.

Nothing he could do to change any of this.

John closed his eyes, and waited for... What? The end? Death? He was very much aware that he wasn't dying himself, so he wasn't sure what he expected... But it didn't matter now.

"Major."

John half-roused himself from the daze he had slipped into. Had that voice been real, or...? He stared at Rodney, hoping irrationally for some sign... But he lay as still as before, and the pool of blood had spread further. No, it must have been...

"Major!"

This time John could locate the voice, and his head snapped upwards, to the top of the hole.

"Teyla?"

He could hardly believe it for a second, figured his mind was playing tricks on him. But there she was, standing above and looking down with concern clearly written on her face. Yes, she was real.

"Teyla!" he shouted up, suddenly regaining all the strength he had lost with the onset of despair. "McKay's hurt, call Atlantis!"

He tried to convey the urgency to her, and was frustrated when she lingered a moment longer. "Are you also hurt?"

"Yeah..." He thought of telling her more, then glanced again at McKay... No, no time. It might not be too late yet - if they hurried. "Yeah, but McKay's not good. Go."

Not exactly his most lucid attempt at communication, but Teyla gave a confident nod, and disappeared from view. He could hear her calling to Ford; she'd understood. Teyla always understood.

"Hang on, McKay, help's coming."

It was a bitter thought that he couldn't have been the one to give that help... But who really cared if it turned out all right?

"Just hang on."

It seemed like forever until help did arrive. A long, timeless stretch of tortuous anxiety during which John kept talking, trying to hold himself and Rodney for as long as it took. He didn't know if it actually made a difference to his friend: Rodney seemed to have gone somewhere far beyond anything that could affect him. But John wouldn't accept that, not now that there was hope.

And talking certainly did help him, so that's what he did.

Teyla stood guard at the top of the pit, P-90 ready, while Aiden ran towards the Gate, and help.

He'd set off at his fastest pace when she'd told him that Major Sheppard and Dr. McKay were injured. She could only hope and pray that it would be fast enough.

She hadn't been able to see Rodney, not even from the nearest she'd dared to stand to the obviously unsafe edge of the pit. But the tone Major Sheppard had used had conjured up all sorts of visions, some imaginary, and many real, of violent deaths. Even when men didn't fight eachother, they still had to beware of nature. Sometimes it was the latter that did the worse damage.

She peered worriedly into the trees, futilely searching for signs of Lieutenant Ford's return. She'd hear him long before she could see him, but that didn't stop her from using all her senses to try to get the earliest knowledge of his return with the help from Atlantis.

Major Sheppard had been injured too, fairly badly, from what Teyla had been able to see in the dimness below. She wished with a sudden, bitter ferocity that she could do something for them right now. What good was she doing standing here? Keeping guard - against what? If the medical team waited much longer, she was very much afraid that nothing she could guard against could make things worse for either of the injured men below her.

Teyla sighed. Her life under the Wraith had familiarised her with feelings of helplessness and inadequacy. But it never made it any easier to just do what she could, and forget about what it was they really needed... What she couldn't give them.

She heard a murmur from below, a voice. She cocked her head and stepped a little closer.

It was John, talking to McKay.

"When you wake up and start telling me what an idiot I was to get you into this mess, McKay, I just might agree with you."

A smile lifted one side of Teyla's mouth. It was good to hear the Major's voice, and as long as he was talking she could keep that worry at bay. Though the fact that McKay wasn't answering could only be interpreted as confirmation of her suspicions as to his state.

"You wouldn't want to miss a chance like that would you?"

Major Sheppard and Dr. McKay had a very... unusual friendship. They spent most of their time either arguing or baiting eachother. But Teyla had recognised very soon after her arrival in Atlantis that these two somehow, against all probability, had something in common.

She had never met anyone like Dr. Rodney McKay, and hadn't understood at first how anyone could get along with him. His "conversations" seemed to consist only of complaints or derogatory remarks about others. He was easily the most arrogant man she'd ever come across... Or so it had appeared.

Teyla had discovered that one of the biggest surprises in the City of the Ancients was the true nature of Dr. Rodney McKay. She had come to recognise a very brave, very good, unselfish and caring man - who gave the almost flawless impression of being just the opposite.

"Don't die, Rodney... Cause if you do, I'll have to put Kavanagh on my team, and I know you wouldn't 't like that."

Major John Sheppard was more what he seemed, but also unlike anyone else she had ever some across in all her interplanetary travels. (Although, admittedly, those were beginning to seem insignificant by comparison to those of the people of Earth.) But John Sheppard still hid a lot of himself beneath a mask... And to hear him desperately trying to keep a dying friend alive with only his voice revealed a lot about the side he usually kept buried.

He was just the opposite of Rodney, in a way: Everyone liked him. But he had very, very few friends, and in that they were alike.

"Kavanagh's even more annoying than you. It'd be enough to make Teyla and Ford count their blessings."

Teyla didn't smile at this. She already had counted her blessings in her teammates. She didn't need the loss of any of those to make her recognise how fortunate she was.

"Hang in there, McKay. I'm not gonna lose you now."

Teyla gritted her teeth in frustration, knowing how little say John had in the matter. She'd seen so many people killed, taken; all she could do was stand by and watch. Friends... And family...

It was terrible to realise that even with all the technology and the knowledge that the people from Earth possessed, they also had no choice but to stand by and watch as people they cared about were taken from them.

But Teyla knew that that didn't mean you stopped trying. It just meant that you had to try harder.

Teyla's head whipped around as she heard a sound in the underbrush nearby. Someone running... More than one person, in fact. Yes, it could only be Lieutenant Ford with the medical team from Atlantis.

Teyla smiled. Maybe they wouldn't lose this battle after all.

John heard noises from above, people talking, running feet...

"Teyla?"

He didn't see her, but he heard her call down, "The doctors have arrived from Atlantis."

John didn't say anything, he just nodded weakly, even though there was no one there to see him. He wasn't feeling too well...

"They got here, McKay. You'll be all right."

And after that, everything was a little bit blurry. Rescue teams came down and checked them both. They got him out, got McKay out.

Then he stood, with Ford's help and against Teyla's protests, on the surface and watched the medics clustered around the stretcher they'd put Rodney on. Rodney hadn't regained consciousness throughout the whole process of being pulled from the pit. John hadn't liked the looks on the doctors' faces then, and he didn't like the looks on Aiden's and Teyla's now.

"He's gotta be okay," John said, defying what he and everyone else felt. He gulped, sick as much with worry as with his various injuries. "It's my fault he's like that."

"Not your fault, sir."

"There is no way you could have prevented this, Major."

John nodded. He wasn't convinced... But it still helped a little. "Thanks," he told them.

A couple of medics came to look John over, applying field dressings and putting something on his dislocated arm until it could be fixed properly in Atlantis. Then they headed back towards the rest of the medics - all taking care of Rodney. John, Aiden and Teyla just watched, knowing all too well that there was nothing they could do.

After what seemed an eternity, during which Ford and Teyla both tried several times, unsuccessfully, to get him to at least sit down, John saw a harried Dr. Beckett coming towards them. He looked almost as worried as John felt. But not quite as dirty, John's mind added on its own.

"Doc?" That was Ford. John didn't seem to be able to find his voice any more.

"It should be safe to move him now, so we need to get you both back to Atlantis." Beckett wasn't hiding how serious this was. "But if we hurry... He's lost a lot of blood, but there's a good chance he'll recover."

John heard three huge sighs of relief, one of them his own.

He saw some medics coming towards him with a stretcher, and found he couldn't hold on to consciousness any longer.

He didn't even remember the hurried trip back to the Stargate, and the safety of Atlantis.

* * *

_Author's Note: Hm... Well, this complicates matters. Now John feels guilty, too! I think our boys really need to have a talk and sort this whole thing out... Stay tuned for Part 3!_


	3. Part III: Atlantis

A Friend In Need

Author's Note: Wowie, more great reviews! You people are FANTASTIC:D I was making loud squeeing noises while I read them. :) This story was sort of my magnum opus, so I really, really can't tell you how thrilled I am with the response! I'm very glad now that I posted it!

gothgirl8910 - Thanks, I'm so glad!  
Elisa - Thanks so much:D Yeah, Rodney doesn't have the best luck, does he? Poor thing... :) I'm so glad you're enjoying this so much. :) I sure enjoy reading your reviews!  
potterfan2006 - Thank you, and indeed I will!  
Titan5 - Thank you, I'm glad you like it! Yes the boys are very whumped, aren't they? (Giggles maniacally) ;)  
forlornhope1865 - GASP! (Dances) Yay, I'm going on someone's favourites list! Thank you:D And I'm so glad you like my whumping, I worked hard on it. ;)  
Baileysmom - Um, I guess that didn't come out right... I have a great deal of respect for nurses, partly because I do have some idea of how hard it is to study, qualify, etc., from one of my friends who is a nurse. Sorry about that, nothing derogatory was meant there. :) Thanks for the review, and I'm glad you liked it on the whole!  
parisindy - Thanks, Part 3 ahoy!  
angw - Yes, they're very bad boys, aren't they? Tsk. I'm so pleased you liked my character stuff, and enjoy the last chapter:D  
fififolle - Thanks, I mean, really REALLY, thank you for that lovely review! I'm particularly glad that you liked the Teyla bit so much, because I have trouble getting her head sometimes. But I really wanted to show Rodney from her POV. :) Thank you!  
em - Thank you, I'm so happy that you liked Part 2 even better! I just hope Part 3 isn't a letdown... :)  
rogue1503 - I still can't believe someone's actually excited about something I wrote! (Looks vaguely uneasy) Anyway... Have fun with it, and thanks for reviewing:D  
Andy - Thank you! I did try hard with this fic to make sure it expanded on the framework of the show, rather than contradicting it... It's great to hear you think it worked! Yay:D  
Silverthreads - Wow, thank you! (Blushes and can't think of anything else to say.) :)  
Kitty - Yeah, I apologise for that... Even John's concussion isn't really enough to justify his thinking of something that dumb. But I really, really wanted to do that scene:p So, yes, sorry; I know it's completely beyond reality, but it was just so much fun. (Looks embarrassed) As for the chat... coming up! And Carson gets a couple bits as well, which I hope you like. :)  
ESCotLoE - You know, you really are good at this! Here's the last bit, before you turn any unnatural colours. ;) And I'm very happy you loved it:D  
fanficaddict - Glad you liked it, thanks :) - and here's some more!  
cybersyd42 - I'm so very pleased that you like it, especially the John and Rodney friendship! They do have really bad issues, don't they? I mean, seriously. And as for the alcohol... If you whump them enough, you don't even need it, they're already pretty out of it. >:) Heh heh.  
L E McMurray - Yeah, I had some trouble with that darn newfangled chapter updating thingy... Ahem. ;) I'm glad it was worth it! Those two need to learn how to communicate, don't they:p  
bayas - Wow, I'm so flattered! And your English is very good indeed. :) Here's the next chapter, and I hope you like it!  
szhismine - I know, not a good mission for him... But, hey, he's just sooooo cute whumped and guilty! >:) Here's the next bit... :)

If there's anyone I missed replying to... It's nothing personal, just my own stupidity. :) Thank you all so much for the lovely reviews! I'm a little concerned now that I have a lot to live up to with the ending... :) So I hope you all enjoy it. And thank you so much in advance for any more reviews any of you will write: they will be read avidly, and will be very, very much appreciated. :) Thank you all so much:D

On to the final chapter...

* * *

**Part 3: Atlantis**

John stared up at the ceiling from his bed. Back in Atlantis, back on the sick list. Or the convalescing list, anyway.

But at least he wasn't in the infirmary. He was in his own room, staring up at his own ceiling. It was funny that hospital and infirmary ceilings always seemed to be more boring than others. It was even funnier that this held true in another galaxy - especially since the ceilings in Atlantis all looked alike and had no cracks.

Still, John was bored.

He _had_ had to go to the infirmary for a while after all, of course. But it hadn't been so bad, since he'd been unconscious most of the time he was there, either from his concussion or from the drugs that Beckett gave him.

But he'd complained a lot after he'd woken up, so they'd let him go be bored in his own room instead. McKay had the right ideas about how to avoid things like that, and John Sheppard wasn't one to pass up a successful tactic.

John shifted on his bed. He'd already tried reading the book he'd brought for times like this, _War And Peace,_ and he'd got through a good one-and-a-half paragraphs of it. But now he was bored again.

He thought he'd go take a walk. Someone would probably waylay him, scold him for being up, and hustle him back to his room... But, hey, it would kill some time anyway.

John accordingly half-rolled onto his feet, waited a moment to see if this would make him dizzy, and smiled when he found it didn't. Yep, no more infirmary. For now.

Well, not as an inmate anyway.

Because John couldn't really think of anyplace to go, except to visit a certain annoying scientist who happened to be on the mend... in the infirmary. Well, they'd never think to throw him out of there, would they? They spent so much time trying to get him to stay there.

John grabbed a chocolate bar, which he stuffed in his pocket, and, thus armed, he set off on his perilous journey.

Luckily, he made it through the hallways without incident. Ran into a few soldiers and technicians, but the soldiers he just gave a Don't Mess With Me, I'm Your CO look, and the technicians didn't bother him. Which was fortunate - for them. And no Dr. Weir in sight, which was fortunate for him.

John rounded the last corner and found himself back in the torture chamber/prison camp that was the Atlantis infirmary. The waiting area he completely ignored; he wasn't here to wait for anything. As he made his way towards his goal at the far end of the room, a cranky voice could be heard:

"Carson, how many more times do I have to explain this to you? I need my laptop and my radio, or better yet, I need to get out of here. But I definitely need one of the above. Now."

John grinned. Oh yes, Rodney McKay was definitely on the mend.

"Rodney, you're not fit yet, and until you are, I'll not be letting you go back to work, and that's final."

"Pardon me? Who put you in charge, hmm?"

"Dr. Weir, as a matter of fact."

"Well, I'd be perfectly willing to take it up with her, then."

"Good try Rodney, but that won't work either."

"Look, Carson, it's really, really important!"

"And Atlantis is going to sink again if you aren't out there to keep an eye on it?"

"How would I know! I can't tell from in here! And if it did, you probably wouldn't even tell me until we were all dead."

"Rodney, Atlantis has survived ten thousand years without you, I think it can survive a few more days."

"Oh, right, one miracle and you decide to tempt Fate by gambling on another with our lives. Besides, that was before there were a lot of unsupervised people wandering around, messing things up."

"You mean your research teams?"

"Yes, _my_ research teams!"

"Who will have to get along without you for a short while. Sorry, Rodney."

"Hmmph! You don't sound sorry."

"Aye, well after all the noise you've been making, I'll be glad to see the end of you, Rodney. I'd just rather it lasted more than a few minutes, so you'll have to work on getting well for a bit."

"Well, at least give me _something_ to do!"

"You might try sleeping - you haven't been doing enough of that lately."

"That is so not helpful."

"Until you get your strength back that's the best I can offer you, Rodney."

"Carson!"

John was chuckling to himself from his perch on a nearby bed as Beckett emerged from Rodney's curtained alcove.

"Well, hello, Major. I wasn't expecting to see you back so soon," Beckett said with a humorous twinkle in his eyes.

John got to his feet and cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah... I won't be needing your professional services this time. Just came to see McKay."

"Glad to hear it," the MD smiled. He stuck his head back into Rodney's "room". "Rodney, visitor for you."

"Good!" snapped Rodney grumpily. "Probably about that energy source; not that it's that much good, but still, it's about time."

John took this to be his cue, and with a wave to Beckett, he sauntered over to Rodney's bed.

"Hey."

Rodney looked up in wide-eyed surprise at John's greeting, then quickly ducked his head to hide his expression.

"Oh, hi," he responded, far too blandly.

John had hardly seen Rodney since their return to Atlantis. And between Rodney's condition and his own, he hadn't gotten a single chance to talk to him yet. The main reason John had come now was really to say a few things that he felt Rodney should hear.

Only trouble was, he didn't have a clue where to start.

Sheppard settled himself in a nearby chair with a sigh, and looked at Rodney. He could see he wasn't going to be getting any help from that direction. The scientist had turned his gaze toward the wall, and was nervously pulling at the blanket on his hospital bed.

John cleared his throat again, then decided to just set off and hope for the best. "Look, McKay..." But that was as far as he got before being interrupted by the man in question.

"I know, I know, I was stupid, and I shouldn't have done it, and I know it's my fault. I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean for that to happen or anything, but it won't ever happen again, because I -" A pause for breath and a nervous gulp here. "Because I'm not going to be on the team any more. I'll talk to Elizabeth about finding someone better... A replacement..." He looked very unhappy.

John finally found words. "McKay, what the hell are you talking about?"

Rodney rolled his eyes and glanced up angrily before tilting his head downwards again defensively. "About how I almost killed you on two consecutive missions, that's what! What do you mean, 'What am I talking about?' What else would I be talking about!"

John was surprised. After all he'd put McKay through... The scientist was still blaming himself?

"No, actually, I should be the one to take the blame," John ventured, deciding to try straight-forwardness.

"Oh please," Rodney sighed, again without making eye contact. "I'm the last to criticise anyone for a sense of humour, but I can only take so much, you know? Just go away. Say what you really came for and just leave me alone." Rodney turned toward the wall completely so John could only see his hunched shoulders.

John assumed a more casual position in his chair. He couldn't have asked for a better opening.

"Okay," John drawled, "I will." He paused a moment to consider the best way to word it, and then decided he didn't care, and just dove in. "I came to thank you for saving my life. And to apologise for almost losing yours."

The shoulders tightened. "Really, Major, I meant it." Rodney's voice went a little higher up the scale. "I'm too tired for this right now, and it just - it isn't funny!"

"I'm not joking, Rodney." John's voice was serious enough to make even Rodney think a little. He turned over, looking surprised again. Sheppard's gaze held steady under the grey-eyed scrutiny.

"You really think that?" Rodney finally asked in disbelief. He received a deliberate nod in reply. Anger at himself once again filled the scientist's eyes. "What are you, delusional? Because I hadn't thought you were that far gone at the time. I'm a menace. I almost killed you!"

"No, McKay," John contradicted him calmly, "you saved my life. And I wanted you to know that I appreciate that. If you hadn't been there on that rock planet-"

"Nothing would have gone wrong! And if it hadn't been for the brilliant Dr. Rodney McKay on P6A-260, you wouldn't have gotten a concussion, a dislocated arm, and who knows what else!" Rodney's control snapped then, and there was a suspicious wetness in his eyes as he growled the next sentences. "And I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry! I don't mean to hurt people all the time, I'm just..." He swiped impatiently at his face with one hand. "I'm always screwing things up... I can't take it any more." He buried his head in his hands.

John considered the scientist in front of him with a worried frown. Rodney McKay was a member of his team, an important one. And John meant to keep it that way. All he had to do was convince McKay of this.

And he was also his friend. On impulse, John reached forward and grasped Rodney's arm. Rodney half-heartedly tried to jerk away, but John didn't let go.

"Rodney, you're part of my team-"

"Yes, something I intend to rectify very soon!"

"Just shut up a minute, I'm trying to talk," Sheppard said amiably. Rodney was quiet. "You did save my life on that planet, and everyone seems to know that except you. So thank you. And I almost caused your death by letting you try to climb out of that damn hole, so I'm sorry."

Rodney's hands fell away from his face, and as he looked up at John, he seemed very, very tired. "You're welcome," he said, "for what that's worth. And it's all right."

"Good," said Sheppard, feeling a little of the strain slip off his conscience.

"But that doesn't change the fact that you could have died... and... and there would have been nothing I could do... It would have been my fault."

"Look, McKay... In these sort of situations, things happen." He heaved a sigh, recalling all the things that he'd witness go wrong over his years of soldiering. Things that should have gone right. "It isn't always someone's fault. All you can do sometimes is respond to a bad situation as best you can." The grey eyes were frowning into his own, trying to understand. "And you did. You did good, Rodney."

Rodney's face dropped into his hands again. "But I should... I should have been able to do better."

John gave the unresponsive arm a pat. "No one could have done better."

Rodney's tone changed to one of irritation. "How would you know? You were unconscious."

John leaned back again. "Teyla and Ford told me."

"Oh, great."

"They were really impressed."

Rodney's face snapped back into view again, looking seriously confused. "Wait... They were?"

"Yeah," John went on. "Ford said he thought you'd gotten the record for dragging me back to the Gate single-handed."

"He - he did?"

"And Teyla said she was proud to know someone like you."

A delighted smile spread over Rodney's face. "Teyla said that?"

"Yep. And then Ford said he was, too."

"He did?" The smile, if anything, got wider. "You're sure they weren't, you know," he waved one hand around, "saying something else?"

John squinted at him. "Pretty sure, yeah."

"Hunh!" was Rodney's concise and very pleased comment.

John refrained from saying that he, too, agreed with this sentiment. He also deliberately left out everything that had been said, by various persons, about McKay while he'd been unconscious and at death's door. The man didn't need that much of an ego boost.

"See, McKay? We all want you on the team." He paused, feigning a certain amount of shock. "Goodness only knows why. I guess we like being annoyed constantly."

"Ha ha, very funny," said McKay, but John was happy to note that the sparkle had returned to his eyes.

"So get better quick, McKay," John instructed, getting up to leave. "If we get much more peace and quiet, we might end up changing our minds by the time Beckett clears you to go off-world again."

"Yes, well, Carson will have to let me out of here soon, anyway, or I might die of boredom," Rodney snorted.

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

"How'd you get him to let you leave early?"

John shrugged. "He said one whining patient was all he could handle."

Rodney looked affronted. "I don't whine."

John spread his arms in a helpless gesture. "Neither do I."

There was a pause while both men considered this. Rodney yawned.

"Actually," he said, "I'd probably better be getting some rest."

"You do that. And hey," John said, getting an idea, "maybe when you're up for it, we could get Beckett to let Ford and Teyla come in here for that poker game."

Rodney brightened yet again. "Yes, that's not a bad idea."

"Good." John turned to go, then turned back again. "Oh, and they both told me to tell you to get well soon."

"Uh... Tell them that I said, ah... Thanks."

John nodded, and with a final wave, walked out of the infirmary, leaving one much happier scientist with his own thoughts.

He was still part of the team; they still wanted him. After all these years, someone had actually passed up an opportunity to get rid of him. And not just one person either, which would have been shocking enough: _three_ people!

Rodney snuggled down in bed, pulling at the covers to re-arrange them, and feeling an odd warmth inside that he hadn't felt in a very, very long time. They'd said they were proud of him. Of _him,_ Rodney McKay. No one had ever told him that before. He wondered if the Major was proud of him too - he hadn't said.

But he had said he'd saved his life. And thanked him for it. Rodney frowned, thinking that people didn't often thank him for things. Not that he really minded: after all, he just did his job, and he was used to not being thanked for that. And he tried not to interact on a personal level with anyone, if he could help it. He'd always found that that kind of naiveté just led to misery, and studiously avoided it. But now...

Now that he had friends.

Rodney realised that Teyla and Ford and Major Sheppard _were_ his friends. He didn't know why, but they seemed to be doing it deliberately. _Maybe,_ a small nasty voice inside him said, _Maybe they're just stringing you on, making a fool of you._ But Rodney shut the voice up. He might have believed that before, but not now. For some reason... He was sure that they meant it.

_A friend in need is a friend indeed,_ he thought with a smile.

Carson had told him some of what had gone on on P6A-260, and shortly after. Not much, just enough to scare Rodney by letting him know how close it had been. How he'd almost died of blood loss, and if it hadn't been for an Ancient medical device they'd figured out how to work recently, he wouldn't have made it. Actually, Rodney had gathered that last more from eavesdropping than from actual conversations, but that wasn't the point.

He couldn't remember most of what had happened after trying to climb out of the pit. Just a feeling that the Major was there for him, that he had to pull through for the Major. And then a long, long darkness, during which he'd wished he could die. It would have been a lot easier than living.

But there was the Major. The Major hadn't wanted him to die. So he'd held on.

And then he'd woken up back in Atlantis, and remembered what he'd done. Not just one mistake, but so many, more than he could count, more than anyone could ever forgive him for. He'd tried to ride out the flood of guilt, but he couldn't convince himself that there was any reason he shouldn't have died. He'd decided that he'd invented the idea that anyone wanted him, least of all Major Sheppard. Somehow, deep inside, he hadn't been able to believe, especially after all he'd done wrong, that anyone wouldn't be glad to get rid of him for good.

But then he'd heard John asking Carson about him concernedly one day. He'd heard Ford and Teyla talking in lowered voices as they sat in the infirmary just... being there. For him. He'd heard Elizabeth asking after him in a worried tone, and Peter Grodin and that Czech scientist... _Um, starts with a Z and ends with an A... Oh well._ He'd heard them hanging around, inquiring sometimes a few times a day.

And he'd started to hope that maybe there was a reason to live.

And now Sheppard himself had come. And Rodney _knew_ he had a friend. If everyone else decided they wished he had died after all, he knew the Major was glad he'd made it.

And so was Rodney, now.

He rolled over, trying to get into the most comfortable position to go to sleep. It was while he was tugging his blankets around that he found the chocolate bar lying on the bed. Rodney picked it up, puzzled for a minute... And then broke into an almost shy smile. The Major had left it for him. No one had ever given him something like that, not asking anything in return, not even recognition.

Rodney stared at the candy bar, and thought of his family, his face creasing slightly in a pain that was more than physical. They'd given only grudgingly of everything they had, from their time, to their kindness, to their money. And goodness only knew what they'd wanted back; he'd never really known - just that it wasn't anything he'd ever done. All that had been wrong.

Rodney knew it was his loveless childhood that had made him the lonely, self-centred, disagreeable loser he was now. He had started to despair of ever finding anyone who would be his friend, who would help him to get over his past and show him how to be, maybe, a little... normal. To show him, convince him, that there were good people in the world after all.

And Major Sheppard, Aiden Ford, and Teyla - Rodney's team - had shown him that. They'd taken the first steps towards undoing the scars of his earlier life. It would take time, though; the years of neglect Rodney's parents had put him through couldn't be fixed or forgotten overnight.

Every little slip, everything he did wrong, real or imagined, every failing: he had never been allowed to forget any of it. No forgiveness. Nothing had ever been all right.

They hadn't been his friends, let alone a proper family. That concept had been an impossible ideal to Rodney. Maybe, if they'd ever showed that they cared... But they hadn't seemed to consider that to be part of being parents. Jeannie certainly hadn't been bothered to spend the time or the effort to care. After a while, he'd stopped expecting anything, tried to hide behind a mask of indifference and cynicism. And maybe that was why this came as such a surprise. Why now he almost couldn't believe it was really true.

But, he told himself, squeezing the candy slightly, feeling the solid proof - it _was_ real.

And that small amount of love and friendship was all that it took to make Rodney believe that, somehow, all those things that had gone wrong really were all right now. That someday, he'd really be worth something to someone.

Rodney stuffed the chocolate under his pillow, and fell asleep smiling, thinking of missions, and arguments, and poker games.

It was the next day that Elizabeth Weir was walking down towards the infirmary to check on the status of her chief scientific officer. This particular section of the City was usually silent, since quiet was required in the infirmary, so she was surprised to hear several raised voices.

She lifted her eyebrows at the burst of noisy laughter that broke out as she stepped into the infirmary. Carson Beckett caught sight of her as she located the source of the gaiety: a bed at the back of the room. Rodney's. She should have known.

Beckett walked over to her. "Carson?" she inquired with narrowed eyes and a small smile.

The medical doctor raised his hands in surrender. "I know, they're a bit noisy, aren't they?" Elizabeth nodded. They certainly were. "Major Sheppard, Lieutenant Ford and Teyla all showed up today with a pack of cards, and said they had a prior engagement with Rodney. I was going to turn them away but..." He trailed off thoughtfully.

"What?" asked Elizabeth, not understanding.

"Rodney asked me not to," Carson finished. "To tell you the truth, it wasn't so much a request as an order. But he's been so much better since the Major came to visit that I thought I'd make an exception."

Another loud burst of merriment from the other end of the room provoked a smile from both Carson and Elizabeth.

"It's a good thing the infirmary's empty at the moment," Elizabeth commented wryly.

"Aye," Beckett agreed in dismay. "They _had_ promised to be quiet."

Dr. Weir shook her head. If this was their idea of quiet, she hoped they never decided to be noisy. "What exactly are they doing?"

Beckett raised his eyebrows. "They're playing poker. I gather Rodney's losing."

He held up a hand for her to listen. A voice emanated from the end of the room: "I told you you should have folded McKay."

"How would you know? They're my cards! What, have you been peeking or something?"

"No, McKay, it's just you have to learn the meaning of the word 'bluff'."

"I know what 'bluff' means, Major."

"Yeah? Your eye twitches."

"No it doesn't!" Pause. "Does it?"

Ford's voice: "Yep."

"Oh. Um... oh."

"I believe you owe me your entire stock of chocolate, Dr. McKay."

"Yes, I am acutely and painfully aware of that, Teyla. I told you I was no good at this game."

"Yeah, you were right about that."

"Kindly shut up, Major, your comments are far from helpful."

Rodney's face must have been priceless, because this provoked another round of laughter. Then Teyla's voice came through again.

"I suggest we reset the stakes. It is hardly challenging any more."

"Yeah, I think I lost my shirt in the last round."

"Yes, sir. And I lost my next movie night choice."

Teasingly, "Yes, I must thank you, Major, for teaching me this game. It is most rewarding."

"Um... You're welcome, Teyla."

"Well, apparently I'm not the only one who doesn't know what 'bluffing' means, huh?"

"No need to rub salt in the wound, McKay, you're getting your chocolate back."

"What, really?"

"Yeah."

"Were you not listening a moment ago, Doctor?"

"Well, I was, but..."

"C'mon, lighten up, McKay! You're way too jumpy. Not like there's anything life-threatening about this, even if Teyla _is_ playing."

"Yes... Yes, I suppose you're right about that, Major."

"Good. On with the game?"

Elizabeth turned back to Carson. "Well, he sounds... happy."

"Aye, he does." Carson gave Elizabeth another smile, and shook his head again. "I had reason to be concerned. After he woke up, he seemed to be going into some sort of depression. I suspect he may have been heading towards a relapse. But now..." He listened another moment to the voices behind the curtain. "Now he's recovering very quickly. There's no medical substitute for a few friends to show you that life is worthwhile."

Elizabeth nodded seriously. Once again, Rodney's voice was raised in half-put-on protest.

"Seriously, Major, what have you been teaching her? The best Vegas tricks?"

"If I had, I'd be using them myself, wouldn't I?"

"Maybe she's just better than you at the sleight of hand."

"I assure you, I am playing with perfect fairness, Dr. McKay."

"Yeah, Doc. We should just face it that Teyla's better than all of us put together."

"Thank you Lieutenant!"

"Yeah, well maybe you admit defeat, Ford, but I'm not through just yet..."

"Ah - are _those_ your cards, Major? I'm afraid you are through."

"Damn. You been learning tricks off Teyla now, McKay?"

"No, um, I just got lucky, I suppose." The smug tone belied his words.

"Well, maybe you and Teyla could save a little for the rest of us."

"Yes, maybe..."

"Or again, perhaps not."

"Hey! C'mon, Teyla... Lieutenant, back me up here."

"Sorry, sir, I'm out."

"Aw... nuts."

Elizabeth nodded to Carson. "I'll postpone my visit for later." And, with another smile, she left the infirmary, leaving Beckett to listen to the happy chatter.

"Ah, I seem to have won again, Major."

"McKay, you were losing a minute ago. When did you get this lucky?"

"Oh, I don't know... Does it matter?"

"Yeah, cause whatever caused it, I want some, too."

"You think my luck will stretch to getting out of the infirmary soon?"

"Hope so."

"And me."

"As do I."

"Um... Yes, ah, thank you. So do I."

"No problem, McKay. But in the future, you ought to work on spending less time in here."

"Oh, you're one to talk, Major Accident-Prone Sheppard."

"Hey, I'm not the one who fell down the hole twice."

"Oh, and who's fault was that, huh?"

"I think we decided it was... What was that again, Lieutenant?"

"The planet's fault, sir."

"Yep, it was the planet's fault. What do you say, Teyla?"

"I believe you are right about that, Major."

"See, McKay? It's unanimous."

"Hm, yes. The planet's fault, I can go for that."

"Good."

**The End**

* * *

_Author's Note: And that's it! Hoped you enjoyed the ending. :) And I tried to bring it, at the end,up to where the team relationship was at the start of Poisoning the Well, so I hope that worked out... I'm so pleased with the positive response -you're all the best!_


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